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Valentine's Day as told by Squidward Tentacles

"It's just a cruel reminder that I'm single and likely to remain that way forever"

Amanda Rajnauth

Feb 14, 2018

John Jay College of Criminal Justice

182

Valentine's Day as told by Squidward Tentacles

Know Your Meme

Ah, Valentine's Day. For many couples, this is a romantic day filled with roses, chocolates and most importantly, love. However, some of us aren't fortunate enough to be in a relationship right now. This makes Valentine's Day a bitter reminder of our loneliness. And no one understands this ideal better than Squidward Q. Tentacles.

1. Waking up on the dreaded February 14th.

2. Seeing all of the happy couples.

3. Getting a Valentine's Day card, but there's no chocolate.

4. Buying all of the discounted Valentine goodies for yourself.

5. Meeting someone who you decide to take your shot with.

6. Only to find out they're already in a relationship.

7. But its okay, because you have a hot date lined up tonight with yourself.

8. Because let's face it: You're a catch.

Regardless of relationship status, I hope everyone has a happy Valentine's Day!

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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Valentine's Day as told by Squidward Tentacles

"It's just a cruel reminder that I'm single and likely to remain that way forever"

1. Waking up on the dreaded February 14th.

2. Seeing all of the happy couples.

3. Getting a Valentine's Day card, but there's no chocolate.

4. Buying all of the discounted Valentine goodies for yourself.

5. Meeting someone who you decide to take your shot with.

6. Only to find out they're already in a relationship.

7. But its okay, because you have a hot date lined up tonight with yourself.

8. Because let's face it: You're a catch.

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The holiday season can be the best and most stressful time of the year, especially when more people are involved.

1. The Family Traditions

2. Enough food for an actual army

3. Never enough space

4. Always Loud & Never Boring

5. Parties. Parties. Parties.

6. Scheduling

7. Travelling

8. The family members you see once a year

9. DRAMA

10. The questions about life

AKA, Christmas overload.

I'm technically an adult, so I'm legally required to live a little, right?

1. Watch an R-rated Scary Movie in a Movie Theater

2. Buy a Lottery Ticket

3. Vote in an Election

4. Participate in a Run (or a Walk, Realistically) for Charity

5. Go on a Road Trip

6. Start a Savings Account

7. Get a Credit Card

8. Sign up for Spotify Premium

9. Go to a Club

10. Start a Meditation Routine

11. Go to a Yoga Class

12. Treat Myself to a Dinner for One

13. Volunteer for a Charity

14. Participate in a Research Study

15. Bake Something (That Ends Up Being Edible)

16. Go Skydiving

17. Be Called for Jury Duty

18. Figure Out What I Want to Do With my Life

The holiday classics that shaped my life

1."But what would happen if we all tried to be like Santa and learned to give as only he can give: of ourselves, our talents, our love and our hearts? Maybe we could all learn Santa's beautiful lesson and maybe there would finally be peace on Earth and good will toward men."

"Sometimes the most real things in the world are the things we can't see."

"If you won't use your heart, who cares if it gets broken? If you just keep it to yourself, maybe it'll be like my rollerblades. When you do decide to try it, it won't be any good. You should take a chance. Got nothing to lose."

"Remember, no man is a failure who has friends."

"Life is made up of meetings and partings. That is the way of it."

"If you look for it, I've got a sneaky feeling you'll find a that love actually is all around."

"Sometimes things look good on paper, but lose their luster when you see how it affects real folks. I guess a healthy bottom line doesn't mean much if to get it, you have to hurt the ones you depend on."

"'Maybe Christmas,' he thought, 'doesn't come from a store. Maybe Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.'"

"Faith is believing when common sense tells you not to."

"There's room for everyone on the nice list."

Hopefully they will make you laugh.

1. Why are towels considered dirty when you get out of the shower clean?

2. Who closes the bus door once the bus driver gets off?

3. Why is there a "d" in "fridge" but not in "refrigerator"?

4. If you drop soap on the floor is the floor clean or the soap dirty?

5. Is the "S" or the "C" silent in the word "scent"?

6. Does expecting the unexpected make the unexpected the expected?

7. Would Lightning McQueen buy car insurance or life insurance?

8. Who put the alphabet in alphabetical order?

9. What color are mirrors?

10. If 2 mind readers read each other's minds whose mind are they really reading?

11. Is there a synonym for "synonym"?

12. If your shirt isn't tucked into your pants, are your pants tucked into your shirt?

13. Why is it called "quick sand" if you sink slowly in it?

14. If I try to fail, but succeed, which one did I do?

15. If Cinderella's shoe fit perfectly, why did it fall off?

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