My junior and senior year were very confusing for me.
God works in mysterious ways. With those mysterious ways, God has never failed me. My junior year of high-school came to an end so quickly. Everyone started talking about how they had their "dream college" that they were applying for. That "dream college" for me was James Madison University. Now that I can finally be honest with myself, the only reason I had even thought of James Madison University as an option was because it was the only college I had visited. I went their during my sophomore year for a leadership seminar, and I had gotten very comfortable with the college. In reality, I didn't know anything about the school besides the school colors. Embarrassing, I know. During my senior year, I actually started looking at colleges based on what I wanted to study. I planned on majoring in psychology, and pretty much every college I looked at had psychology as one of their top programs. So, I told myself to start looking at colleges based on the type of environment and setting that I wanted. Again, if I'm being honest... I did not care. I just wanted to be away from my home town. Senior year was flying by, and I had not applied anywhere.
I had finally narrowed down my choices.
So, I ended up applying to six colleges. The University of Virginia being one of them, however it was my "reach" school so I did not worry about visiting the college just yet. After visiting most of the colleges, High Point University became the front runner. High Point University just felt like home for me. After being accepted in December, I immediately thought this was my school for the next four years of my life. I constantly had conversations with God asking him if this was the right choice, and if this was his plan for me. For some reason, I kept having these "gut feelings" that High Point University wasn't what God had planned for me. It was almost completely out of my budget, and after going to multiple events at the university... something just did not sit well with me. In reality, these "gut feelings" were actually God speaking to me. However, I ignored Him. At this point I had sent in my deposit and the whole nine yards. I kept thinking to myself, God would not put me through all of this and then tell me that "my school" was not the school for me.
I finally asked God for a sign.
I really did not want to hear what God had to say, because I knew deep down He did not want me to go to High Point, but I wanted to go so badly. After months and months of trying to figure out what God was trying to tell me about these gut feelings, I finally asked him. The University of Virginia did not send out their decisions until late March. So, I had a conversation with God way before that. It was along the lines of, "God if you want me to go to High Point, then do not let me get into UVA." On the other side of the conversation I told God, "If you really want me to attend UVA, then I will get an acceptance letter and forget about High Point and even the rest of the colleges for that matter.
God gave me the sign that I was looking for.
I was so confused, but now I am not.
I kept questioning God's choice to place me at the University of Virginia. I kept thinking I would never be smart enough to "fit in" with the rest of the students. I kept asking myself how in the world would I be able to afford to attend a school that I did not think I would belong at. After listening and trusting God's voice, I officially committed to the University of Virginia. Months after that and into summer break, I started connecting with many students online who were also going to attend. I had not even visited the university, because I thought I was 100% not going to be accepted. However, God obviously had different plans for me. I went to an event for admitted students, and it was then i fell in love with the school. Just a few weeks ago, I attended orientation, and once again fell in love all over again. It was at orientation when I actually felt like I belonged at the University of Virginia. I made so many connections with so many different people, and it was the most amazing thing that had happened to me in a long time. I really think that God wanted to assure me that this was His plan for me, and so He did not stop there. I was so worried about affording college, and I was stressing for days on end trying to figure out what I was going to do. I just kept praying and trusting that God would somehow make this college affordable since this was his plan all along. I had been corresponding with my financial aid advisor for so many long and stressful weeks. You would be happy to know, that in the middle of July I found out that the financial aid that I had applied for and that the univeristy had given me covered 100% of my cost of attendance at UVA. I felt like I was finally on the right path of God's plan for me. Now i know that getting into UVA was not a mistake. It was God's plan all along, and it just took me awhile to hear Him out.
For the past year, I have been working on and growing my relationship with God. Within' that year, He has opened my eyes in so many ways. God has truly blessed me with so many opportunities and I could never thank Him enough for all of the many blessings. This whole “college choosing" experience is just one of the many ways God has helped me follow His plan. Sometimes we think we know what is best for us, but ultimately only God knows. He will speak to you in so many ways to help you figure that out. I talk to God every single day about everything. I tell Him when I'm angry with Him, when I'm confused, when I'm happy, and everything else in between. For this reason, I believe my relationship with God is growing stronger everyday, and it is so much easier to actually feel what He is trying to tell me. I really do not know what else God has planned for me. However, I do know that whatever it is, I will always trust Him no matter the circumstances.
