Simply put, a bar or bat mitzvah is the official welcoming of a young man or woman, at the age of 13, into the world of Judaism. Yes, it typically includes elaborate parties, and maybe even one too many "l'chaims", but it really is so much more than just an over the top birthday party for the Jewish people.
When I was 13, and being invited to so many, it was easy to think just that. I never understood why adults would tear up at services. After all, what does being a bar or bat mitzvah even mean? Wasn't he or she always Jewish- why is it suddenly so important at the age of 13?
But, I've grown up, and have a whole new perspective. While recently watching my brother become bar mitzvahed, I became one of those strange adults that cried. It was a kind of cry I had never experienced before.
It was a cry that was filled with happiness and pride, yet a hint of sadness as well. I definitely couldn't completely fathom my emotions then, and I still don't completely understand them over a week later. And this is when I realized, a bar/bat mitzvah is much more than a marker of adulthood.
One tradition during the service is for the parents of the bar/bat mitzvah to pass the Torah to their child. This act signifies the passing of the Jewish religion from one generation to the next. By taking the Torah, the newly titled Jewish man or woman commits to the religion of Judaism.
This promise to keep Judaism a part of one's life is actually an act greater than one's self. This promise signifies the continuation of Jewish life, a fight our ancestors before us have died for. Literally.
Throughout history, the Jewish people have been persecuted for their beliefs. Those that were lucky enough to leave their homes and escape persecution weren't able to bring many of their belongings. Many were only able to bring their most prized possessions.
Often times, they brought something that symbolized the Jewish religion to them, like Shabbat candlesticks. Risking their lives, with very little in their hands, they fled to safer places, like America, so that their family can hopefully one-day practice religion in peace.
In the face of adversary, it's so easy to give up what is holding you back from being "normal". When you're threatened or an outcast because of your religion, it's so easy to lose faith.
Being a bar or bat mitzvah portrays perseverance. It shows our ancestors dreams coming to life. It shows strength in a community. It shows how one individual's decision and dedication to something contributes to the ideals of an entire community.
So yes, bar and bat mitzvahs are crazy celebrations- including tossing people up in chairs and cheering to l'chaim until you can't anymore. But really, it's so much more than that.