“I don’t want people to tell me it’ll be okay or that they know what I’m going through-- because they don’t know what I’m going through. I just want them to tell me that they know what hurt is and that even though they don’t know what I’m going through, they know how it feels to be in pain.”
This is probably one of the most profound things I have ever been told by someone. I was not anticipating this conversation, nor did I even really want to have it-- but I saw someone who was hurting and I couldn’t turn my back on her. That weekend I was just hoping to have a decent time camping with some friends… but, when do our plans ever go according to what we want? When I chased after the girl who had tears streaming down her face, who was screaming obscenities at me to leave her alone, I least expected the whole ordeal to end up being an explosion of built up secrets. Hearing what I did from this girl, a mere acquaintance, made me realize that we all face our own demons behind closed doors- away from the public eye, and unbeknownst to all who mistaken us for being ‘put together’ or ‘happy’.
Pain is universal. Pain-- the overwhelming sensation that keeps your breath shallow, mind racing, and heart throbbing. Pain is something that causes us to claw at our skin in desperation to tear it from the deepest corners of the hollow cavity of our chest. It is felt across cultures, brought on by death, deception, and disappointment -- but all the same, lead up to an avalanche inside our bodies which temporarily demobilize our semi-functioning selves. Pain reaches across cultures, social classes, and educational levels-- it unites people we would otherwise pass by without a second glance.
I can see this phenomenon happen all around me today. From the earthquake in Nepal to the refugee crisis, from the innocent slaughter of humans to the felling of countries-- pain unites individuals worldwide in an effort to ease the suffering. We fundraise, we spread word, and we get to our knees and pray for those affected. As humans who know pain and have experienced it, we tap into our hearts and spread the antivenom- love - into the communities of individuals in distress. Although it does not completely eradicate the hurt, it eases the suffering.
I’m in no way attempting to romanticize the suffering of anyone, I’m simply trying to point out the opportunities pain brings. As much as I wish it didn’t exist, without it, we would not know what love or happiness is. Pain brings opportunities of growth and maturity, and pulls together people from vastly different cultures and communities. Going through what we go through conditions us to reach out and help those going through similar events and it allows us to sympathize with people going through things we perhaps think we could never endure. Pain breaks us down and molds us. When we fight back, we become stronger, and we reach out to help those who need a hand. Pain makes us more human-- and that, I believe, is beautiful.