My boyfriend and I met on a typical Tuesday evening. Meeting in the campus grille is anything but romantic, but there was something special about that moment. He swears to this day he instantly had to get to know me, but I wasn't sure if I did. Sure, he was cute, but back then, I was a freshman who flirted with anyone and everyone (not something I'm proud of). All that mattered was that our eyes did meet, and the rest, as they say, is history. We played beer pong (I know we were underage. Again, I made a lot of mistakes back then.) We played against each other and kept making eye contact and smiling. We spent a weekend together and at that point, I was fairly certain we were "official." However, after that weekend, something went wrong. I won't go into detail, but whatever we had going on came to a stop, and we both moved on with our lives.
A couple months later, he texted me after passing by on campus. He apologized for what went wrong, and asked if we could still be friends. I forgave him and said sure. Over the next two or so years, we never lost contact. Though we have had times where we did not talk at all because we dated other people, we still had our phases of talking every day. He was always the one I had to tell something to, and my day wasn't complete without talking to him. We became good friends, and he always told me how beautiful I was. He also said that maybe one day, I'd give him another chance at being "official."
One day this past summer, Pat and I were texting as friends (or a little more than friends, rather), and I started to feel something I had maybe always felt, but more genuine and real. Even though I always knew how Pat felt about me, I was afraid to tell him. Would he "friend zone" me like I did him? Needless to say, those fears were completely irrelevant. Pat and I have only been "official" for a few weeks, but I feel like we've been together for years. We spent a few days together at the beach, and though we have to go our separate ways for the rest of the summer and school year, the distance will be more than worth it.
Let me get to the point. After all this time of searching and waiting for someone special to come along, that someone special was right in front of me. It doesn't matter if he is still in South Carolina and I transferred here to Tennessee, because even if it's just for a weekend, the 6 hour drive is worth it. Pat respects me and my boundaries; we have the same views, goals, and intentions when it comes to our relationship. He has been there from the beginning and accepts me for my past and my flaws. He recognized something in me when others, or even myself, couldn't.
Pat taught me a lesson I should've learned years ago when it came to dating. Do not settle. Ever. I'm sure you've heard all of this time and time again, but take it from me. Someone who went from a wild, party-every-weekender, freshman in college, to someone who didn't know who she was or what she was doing with her life, to pretty much having it all together (knock on wood). Be in a relationship with someone who accepts you, but encourages you to be better. Be with someone who is supportive and wants to know every single detail about you. Be with someone who removes all toxins from your life and makes each day a good one.
Everyone out there reading this, girls and guys, I hope you all find someone who makes life as wonderful as Pat does for me. I prayed I would find someone, but it turns out, God had already led him to me (He probably laughed the day I realized I had feelings for him.) Don't settle for someone you don't feel is right for you or compromise your beliefs, and listen to your heart when it comes to timing. Most importantly of all, do not go back to that ex who made you feel like you're worthless, because that's anything but true. As Beyonce once said, "Thank God I found the 'good' in 'goodbye.'"
