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When You're Under 5'4, All 13 Of These Things Are True AF For You

"Sometimes all I want is to be a few inches taller so the world does not look like a dense collection of torsos."

lmullins

Sep 16, 2018

Eastern Michigan University

251

Photo by Daniel Spase from Pexels

In my opinion, 5'4" isn't even that short but having a boyfriend that is a whole foot taller I'm seldom allowed to forget my height. However, what he doesn't know is that there are plenty of advantages to being shorter. In fact - I've seen a few studies that link height to longevity, meaning that some research shows short people live longer. I don't know if that necessarily holds much water but the point remains there are studies.

This of course is satire, directed at all the people who make fun of my height on a regular basis, which I'm sure many can relate to. However, sometimes we just need to have safe space to acknowledge and commiserate on the various, comical trials many like to point out.

If you can't laugh at yourself, then what's the point?

........Right?

Here are some things I may or may not collectively think on a regular basis as someone who isn't "average height".

Conversations often happen over the top of your head.

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When people sitting down are almost the same height as you standing up.

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The reactions when you tell people your height.

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It's inevitable there will be that one guy that steps in front of you at concerts, etc....even though he see's he's clearly five inches taller.

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You look younger than you are.

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I remember specifically as a high school senior with my cadet teaching class I would always be lectured in the middle school about wearing my ID because I would be mistaken for a 6th-8th grader.

Even though no one else wore theirs.

I have also been carded at movie theaters for rated R movies even though I'm 22.

However, when everyone else is 50 - I will look 30. Hahahahaha.

When your younger sibling starts to get taller than you.

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You have to get creative when trying to reach things on higher shelves.

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Sorting through the piles of jeans at stores to find pants that are short.

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Forcing your feet flat on the ground when you sit so they don't dangle.

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Always having to look up some degree during conversations.

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My head is very often confused with an arm rest.

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Having to sit super close to the steering wheel while driving.

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And being reminded every time someone tries to drive your car.

Wearing heels makes you "normal" height.

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My Napoleon complex is satisfied.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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When You're Under 5'4, All 13 Of These Things Are True AF For You

"Sometimes all I want is to be a few inches taller so the world does not look like a dense collection of torsos."

In This Article:

Conversations often happen over the top of your head.

When people sitting down are almost the same height as you standing up.

The reactions when you tell people your height.

It's inevitable there will be that one guy that steps in front of you at concerts, etc....even though he see's he's clearly five inches taller.

You look younger than you are.

When your younger sibling starts to get taller than you.

You have to get creative when trying to reach things on higher shelves.

Sorting through the piles of jeans at stores to find pants that are short.

Forcing your feet flat on the ground when you sit so they don't dangle.

Always having to look up some degree during conversations.

My head is very often confused with an arm rest.

Having to sit super close to the steering wheel while driving.

Wearing heels makes you "normal" height.

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This isn't just for the single Pringles out there either, folks

Run Around Clanging Pots and Pans in Everyone's Face

Eat the Last Few Pigs in a Blanket

Pop Twelve White Grapes

Burn Something

Smash Things Against a Wall

Spontaneously Begin an Irish Jig

Call Your Mother

Throw a Coffee Table Out a Window

Sing "Auld Lang Syne" at the Top of Your Lungs

Do Some Squats

Swan Dive into a Nearly Freezing Body of Water

Take a Shot

Time to be merry and bright.

"First Noel" by Leslie Odom, Jr

"A Holly Jolly Christmas" by Burl Ives

"Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas" by Kelly Clarkson

"All I Want for Christmas Is You" by Mariah Carey

"Christmas (Baby Please Come Home" by Michael Buble

"Last Christmas" by Taylor Swift

"The Christmas Song" by Josh Groban

"White Christmas" by Idina Menzel

"O Holy Night" by David Archuleta

"Believe" by Josh Groban

"Les cloches du hameau" by Celine Dion

Or at least try to do.

1. I will wake up (sorta) on time for class.

2. I will look decent for class.

3. I will go to the gym more.

4. I will go to the library and study more.

5. I will meet new people.

For those long nights that turn into mornings when the struggle is real.

1. Walk in motivated and ready to rock

2. Disappointed you let it get this bad

3. Distracted: When a 10-Minute Break Becomes an Hour

4. When the Yearning for Sleep Sneaks Up

5. In the words of Lorelai Gilmore "Coffee, Coffee, Coffee"

Oh, so done.

You need sleep, but also have 13 things due in the span of 4 days.

1. When it's December 1 and you have seven things due, three exams, and haven't slept in three days.

2. So you stress.

3. And cry.

4. Then call your mom to cry some more.

5. After the pep talk, you feel determined to get everything done.

6. But, now you're tired.

7. And really hungry.

8. Suddenly, it's 2 a.m. and you have only written three sentences and your paper is due in the morning.

9. You've made it to Friday... somehow.

10. Then Sunday hits and you find yourself back at the Lib.

11. So you cry some more.

12. But, you fight through the tears to get everything done because you're determined.

13. In the end, you feel on top of the world because you made it through the last week of class alive.

14. But, now it's finals week so good luck.

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