I’m sure you already know exactly what I am talking about. We all have been in a friendship where we wonder if it is really worth all the trouble they cause us. They might even be your friend since forever ago, but they still drive you insane. Or maybe you are not aware that you are trapped in a toxic friendship. Take this as a sign that you need to let them go.
There is nothing worse than being someone’s personal friend-therapist and not even get paid. Why are you only calling me to unload all your problems on me? This is not to say I am not 100 percent there for my friends, but when it gets to the point that you never ask me how I’m doing or we don’t talk about anything other than your issues, I can't deal with you. If you want to go on and on about your life, pay me and you can lay down on my couch. Also, there is nothing that drives me crazier than complaining about the same things all the time. I honestly don’t want to hear about it anymore. Your petty problems that can be easily fixed is making me not want to be friends with you.
You might not even know it, but you could be inhabiting your friend’s bad habits. I have seen people get sucked into drinking more, smoking cigarettes, eating more junk food and other things just because their friend is doing it. They might not even notice that they are adopting these bad habits until they ditch their toxic friend. This sort of friend is toxic in the most literal way. They might manipulate you into doing these things with them, or you might be under a classic spell of “monkey see monkey do,” but think about your choices for a second and see what is really going on.
Have you ever had a friend you can’t tell anything to because then everyone will know? Yeah, pretty annoying. Your business is suddenly spread around like crazy. You shouldn’t always have to say, “don’t tell this to anyone, but…” because sometimes it is just obvious, but not obvious enough for your friend. They, for some reason, feel the need to blab about your personal life to everyone they know. This friend you can probably live with as a friend, but you know you can never trust them fully.
Sometimes, you have a friend who thinks life is a competition they have to win. It hurts when you win scholarships, for example, and they have to shrink your achievement. They must live off of bringing you down because it is all they do. Friends should be there to support you and be thrilled if something good happens to you! They shouldn’t always try to compete for no reason at all.
You could be in a friendship with someone that doesn’t allow you to make new friends or have new experiences. They could be your best friend, but everyone else around you might think they are extremely mean or negative, so you are unable to meet new people because you constantly are under your friend’s cloud of bad energy. Why would you ever limit yourself because of one person?
If you read any of this and one of your current friends came to mind, consider if their friendship is really worth it. Really think about what you get out of being their friend and imagine what could happen if you broke up with them. Would you make more friends and have less stress and less negativity in your life? Letting toxic people out of your life is not a bad thing; it is an act of self-care.
