Christmas time is a stressful time for most people. There is rushing around and the stress to get the perfect gifts and most of all, the family time that comes with the holiday season. I have always loved the warm feeling that Christmas time brings and never fully understood why people get so overwhelmed by this time of the year, that is until I went to college.

College is wonderful. It is a time for exploration and independence with the availability of your parents on the off-chance you need. (total joke, I call at least one of my parents every. single. day.) However, with that independence comes responsibility and admittedly, some responsibilities I don't want to have.

I come from a split home, growing up predominantly in my Jewish mother's house. This made the decision to spend Christmas at my father's every year an easy one. This year I decided to go to my father's house as usual, but unlike every other year, I hadn't been at my mom's nearly every day for the last few months of school. I was so used to getting on break and heading to my dad's that it felt weird when my mom was upset at my absence.

I never spent extended periods of time at my dad's house growing up so since graduation I have been spending more time with them. As usual, I went to my dad's house after I got out on Winter break and have spent a majority of the time here. After almost two weeks of being in one place (something I haven't experienced since before I graduated high school) I realize that I am full of overwhelming guilt. It is the holiday season and I feel like I am stuck between my families. I feel like I have an obligation to both and unfortunately, I don't want to be bothered. I want to stay stationary, something I never really got to experience as a kid from a two-part family.

That is not to say I love one side more than the other or I dislike one less than I dislike the other. My families are VERY different and I am blessed to have been brought up by this group of crazies, but it is very difficult finding the balance between the two. This is something I have never really had to experience until I got out of my parents' houses and on my own, in charge of making my own decision of where I would be and when I would be there.

So though my family stress maybe different than most people's around the holiday season, I now understand why people get so crazy. But despite it, I will still choose to enjoy the time I get with my dysfunctional fams.