All of the things you could ever ask to find on Twitter gathered in one convenient article. Hi, I’m an Odyssey author, and I’m here to make your dreams come true. Tired of scrolling through Twitter for hours, only to be disappointed by your friend's subpar subtweets? Well, we here at The Odyssey Online are here to help. Our select team of highly qualified humor engineers have come together to bring you not one, not five, dare I say not even 10, but 15 Tweets guaranteed to speak to your soul, and maybe even brighten your day. The subject matter of these Tweets ranges from life coaching, all the way to ideas for new security features online. While some may be presumably offensive to some, they may also be humorous to others. But let’s face it, it’s 2016, and everyone is looking for something to be upset about. So sit back, relax, and put your easily offended tendencies behind you. #Relatable #LiterallyMe #OmgYass #Blessed

@TheBananaFacts

Looks like Dwight Schrute may be running an undercover Twitter account focusing solely on bananas.

@seriouslyemily

Seriously, Emily?! And it was 7, he missed 7.

@toyns

Erik, you don’t need an app for that. The solution you're looking for is called “Thanksgiving Dinner”.

@Reverend_Scott

How much can't, could a white girl can't, if a white girl literally could not even?

@FillWerrel

I was born 10,512,000 minutes ago, and I still look like a potato.

@primawesome

No like, he loves you. Those were his exact words. He wrote a book all about it.

@JessicaValenti

Can we have one for girls too? Whenever you see a passive aggressive sub-tweet or quote, “Notify her best friend”.

@stephenjmolloy

God dammit Ian.

@XplodingUnicorn

It’s important to teach today’s youth about the ins and outs of life. For instance, girls rule, boys drool.

@8bitf0x

Dark humor is still humor.

@CYComedy

Thank God someone finally said it.

@kelseydarragh

Did it work? Also, would you like to be best friends?

@FreakingTrue

A bagel is the strongest circle of trust.

@relatable

Brb my heart is in a puddle.

@AmberTozer

You do you boo, and let the giraffe deal with its boo boo.