My sophomore year of college was a year full of just about every emotion imaginable. It was packed with ups, downs, and everything in between, and it was a year full of learning. I made friends, lost friends, and, most importantly, I learned the importance of being my own friend.
Right before my sophomore year of college began, I finally decided to seek professional help for my mental illnesses. After many years of suffering in silence and denying that I had a problem, I realized that enough was enough. I made the choice to heal myself and commit to recovery. When I first made that brave decision back in September of 2016, I never imagined that it would lead me to where I am now.
As the fall semester progressed, I encountered challenges, but I managed to continue to pull through. My anxiety was overwhelming on many occasions, and there were many times that I thought I was destined to fail. I had no confidence in myself, and I was struggling to apply the new skills I was learning in therapy. However, I continued trying my best, regardless of how difficult it was. I had many days and nights where my body, my mind, and food all seemed like the enemy. Those days still happen, however I’m learning how to navigate these feelings and that those experiences are just that – feelings. Feelings are valid, but feelings don’t always dictate reality.
I’m learning how to best serve myself and my needs. Sometimes that means a day of extra self-care. Sometimes that means having someone help me keep myself accountable. Sometimes that means being honest in therapy even when I really don’t want to. I’m learning how I need to be my own number one priority, and that that isn’t selfish.
This school year was a major turning point in my life. I found who I truly am, and I discovered what my dream career is. I connected with thousands of new people online, and found some of my closest friends. I finally started to tackle the demons that had been destroying my life for far too many years. I created my own path, and said goodbye to the things and people who were no longer bringing light to my life.
In the nine short months of my sophomore year of college, my life completely transformed, and I couldn’t be more grateful.