Over the past few months, and even more specifically weeks as I have inched closer to my 18th birthday, I have thought more and more about my years in childhood, and my coming years as a young adult. And how somewhere along the way my childhood melted into now, and college is just nine months away, when nine months ago my 18th birthday seemed forever away. So with this recent realization of how close the future is, I have also realized it's not 18 that I'm really nervous about, it is everything that comes along with it, and everything that seemed to fly so quickly by.
As a kid I spent a lot of time outside with all the kids who lived in my apartment complex, summers were filled with bike rides down "dare devil hill," forts in the woods, trampoline camp outs with my best friend, exploring in the creeks, pool trips to cool off, and everyone gathering up their spare change in order to walk to Food Lion and buy some ice cream and soda. Days that I used to remember really well that have since become fairly distant memories with kids whose names I can barely recall. That's just the early years, as I got older I spent middle school wishing I was in high school, wishing I could drive, wishing I could stay out past 9 o'clock, and have a boyfriend. All of those things came and went, my dad taught me how to drive, I got a later curfew, I got a boyfriend......a job, AP classes, more responsibility, the things I didn't wish for too. Just recently have I realized how quickly it is all flown by today I am 18, and shortly I will be graduating from high school and soon after moving into college.
All of these over the years I felt as thought I took for granted, I don't think I ever showed enough gratitude, I probably could have tried harder my freshman year of high school, spent more time with family members, including those who have since passed on, tried a bit harder to learn to love my self — and maybe not paint every finger nail a different color and wear 35 jelly bracelets on each arm, but hey, you live and you learn. So many "ifs, buts, and whys" that have come with the past 18 years, things I wish I didn't have to experience, things I wish I had gotten to experience, but also many things that I am so grateful for. Those experiences have molded me into the me that I am proud of. The me that feels ready to start life in college and begin "growing up" in a much different sense than I have so far. I am grateful for my parents, all three of them, who have all had significant roles in who I am, and the person who I have become. I am grateful for my family, from the blood, to the basically blood, who have always loved and cared for me so much, and reminded me how proud they are of me. I am grateful for my boyfriend who has doubled as my best friend for these past 2+ years and been there for my laughs, my cries, my happy's, my sad's, and everything between. Most importantly, I am grateful for my little sister who is a constant reminder of the person I want to be and should be. None of which will go away after turning 18, no matter how much I worry life will change over the coming years
However, the coming years, are something I am both nervous and extremely excited for, I am excited for building a strong friendship with an amazing girl who I have so much in common with, I am excited to explore Boone, I am excited to be a Mountaineer, I am excited to further my education, I am excited to be at a school with my best friend in the enter world, I am excited to further my education and get closer to my dream career, there is so much good to come from this next year. However, I will also be moving out, leaving my family behind, especially my little sister, who is my absolute sunshine, I will be taking on college classes, living on my own, and growing up.
A lot of scary comes along with 18, not the today, not necessarily the tomorrow, but from here on out, and scary isn't always bad, sometimes it is good to step outside of your comfort zone. This crazy thing called life is quite the roller coaster, and I haven't ever seen a roller coaster I wouldn't ride.