I gave him an ultimatum.

"Either decide to support me in the pursuit of my dreams or we will need to rethink this relationship," I demanded.

Hot tears and muffled sobs escaped from the beloved man across the table.

Little did I know, this man had been preparing for weeks to ask me to be his bride. And there I was. Etching cracks into the heart of the man who had so diligently pursued me. He had been pursuing my heart, my dreams, and my desires, only to have me break down and propose an impossible ultimatum.

As we sat across the table from one another in the coffee shop that had housed our first date the emotions that hung in the air eclipsed animosity.

But the story doesn't end there. . .

If I had let that ultimatum stand, I probably wouldn't be married today. I absolutely meant what I said to my boyfriend on that day. I wasn't prepared to give up on my dreams. To forfeit the life I had imagined. The life I had been working so hard for before he even entered the scene. The love I felt for the man who would become my husband was stifled by fears and anxieties that I might never reach my potential.

So how did we go from to enemies on the battlefield of love to man and wife?

God had to do a lot of work in me. I had to address certain fears. I had to weigh the pros and cons of pursuing my dreams without the love of my life by my side. Ultimately, I had to decide if God was big enough to bless a marriage and fulfill my dreams.

Photo By Kristin Jean Photographer

God's Will is Far More Important than Our Agendas

When proposing the horrid ultimatum to my darling future husband I operated under the belief that God wasn't big enough to give me the man of my dreams and the career and education that I longed to achieve. I was desperate not to settle for life in my hometown. I was determined to further my education and I longed to live in a big city.

My husband wanted for a simple life. A life in a slow-paced city. An easy commute to work and a bride who was eager to receive him at the end of a long day.

Our future plans didn't align, but we were madly in love. And more than just the amorous feelings we had for each other was the belief that God had brought us together. The difference of opinions we had about how our futures should look didn't negate the fact that we were well suited for each.

In order for us to overcome the obstacle of melding our future plans and learning to trust each other, we had to learn how to surrender our dreams, desires, and plans to our creator. The perfecter of our faith. The author of our love story.

Photo by Kristin Jean Photographer

I Still Struggle with the "What If's"

Sometimes, I still find myself thinking of my husband as an obstacle to my ambitions. A hurdle in the way of my dreams and desires. I wonder what have happened if my husband and given into my ultimatum.

It is in those moments that I have to humble myself before God and thank Him for the gift He has given me. He has given me a life partner. A cheerleader. A shoulder to cry on and a soul to delight in.

I may not have a wealth of job opportunities or an acceptance letter into the graduate program of my dreams, but God is showing up in my circumstances and providing in ways that I never imagined He could have in the only city I have ever known as home.

God Can Always Redeem Your Dreams and Desires

I am learning to trust the man who made me a bride. Learning to die to my desires so that I can glorify God through the way I love my spouse has been the greatest point of growth in my faith and an incredible component of my testimony.

If you are like me and you are unsure how God could possibly move in your circumstances, to you I say this, "what God has joined together, let no one separate" (Mark 10:9, NIV). Do not let your desires, thoughts or plans, prevent you from embarking on a greater love story than any you could devise yourself.

God is the greatest romance author, the mightiest provider, and the ultimate defender. Learning to seek God's will in your relationships will be difficult, I can promise that. But when both of you are surrendered to God's plan for your lives, your future will become brighter and more beautiful than you could have ever imagined.