Recently, I was at a worship night put on my by the college ministry at the church I attend in Waco. I was right in the middle of worshiping when the lyrics to one of my favorite songs suddenly made me open my eyes up wide, and my mouth fell open in bewilderment.

The song is "King Of My Heart," originally written and performed by Sarah and John Mark McMillan, and also performed by Steffany Gretzinger of Bethel Music.

Every time I've ever sung this song, whether it's been during my own personal time of worship or while leading this song at church, something deep inside my spirit shifts so strongly that I find myself practically sing-screaming the anthem-like-chorus.

You are good, good, oh…

You are good, good, oh…

But this time…this time was different. This time, I was singing this song in the midst of trying to be hopeful in a circumstance that was tempting me to feel really disappointed.

But at one point in the song, I stopped singing and started listening. I let the song wash over me, and once again remind me of God's GOODNESS.

And then, the words to the bridge of the song were sung…

You're never gonna let, never gonna let me down…

You're never gonna let, never gonna let me down… 

At that moment, when I heard these words for what must have been like the umpteenth time, it felt like they practically smacked me in the face. I was dumbfounded. "How had I forgotten such a profoundly simple truth?" I thought to myself.

And then, the Holy Spirit spoke to me, and some things I had been blindsided by earlier that week became clearer.

A few days before this worship night, I found myself suddenly face to face with a circumstance concerning finances that felt really daunting, disappointing, and frustrating. When I came to terms with the fact that this circumstance even existed in the first place, I tried really hard to not feel defeated and disappointed in myself when I knew (or at least, I thought I knew) I had done everything I could to address this need.

But I was trying to address this need on my own by taking full advantage of the two jobs that God had blessed me with this summer. And even though I was believing and hoping, and praying that God would help me meet this financial need solely through these two jobs, I was somewhat afraid that I would find myself in a place where I would have to ask for help from others in order for this need to be met. I realized I wasn't actually relying on God to help me meet this financial need. I was relying on my strength, my ability to work hard, to push myself, and stretch my schedule to fit in as many hours as I could so I could hopefully earn enough money to address this need.

And so, there I was, sobbing into my pillow, humbling admitting that I had been prideful, that I had relied on my own strength to meet my need despite God's blessings, and I felt the weight, pain, and pressure of this need of mine fall on my shoulders.

It was a rough and raw moment for me, y'all.

And here's the thing.

I was willing to trust God and have faith for Him to meet my need, but there was still this lingering underlying fear of mine, one that I'm pretty sure ALL of us deal with at some point in our lives.

I was afraid of being disappointed.

And therefore, I was struggling to fully trust God.

People, because of sin and the fall and our own failings, are unable to keep all of the promises we make. Even with the best intentions and regardless of whom we make those promises to, people fail, people falter, people mess up.

And I was struggling to fully place my trust in God because of how I've trusted in people before and got hurt. BADLY. And in trying to safeguard myself from being hurt and disappointed, I had forgotten that the promises and words God speaks to His children are NEVER in vain. I had forgotten that He sees my need and is completely capable of meeting it because meeting my need, while it seems big to me, is actually so easy for God to meet.

BECAUSE GOD IS NOT LIKE PEOPLE. GOD IS GOD.

GOD NEVER, EVER, EVER, EVER BREAKS A PROMISE HE MAKES TO HIS PEOPLE.

The Bible says in Isaiah 55:10-12a -

"As the rain and the snow
come down from heaven,
and do not return to it
without watering the earth
and making it bud and flourish,
so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater,

so is my word that goes out from my mouth:
It will not return to me empty,
but will accomplish what I desire
and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.

You will go out in joy
and be led forth in peace;
the mountains and hills
will burst into song before you"

The God who said He would deliver the Israelites from slavery in Egypt, who split the Red Sea to make a way for them to walk through to the other side, and who fulfilled that promise when He brought them through the wilderness and into the Promised Land, can SURELY meet my needs, no matter what they are. No question about it.

The God who promised that He would send his Son to save us from the slavery we had put ourselves in because of sin, and who fulfilled His promise to us did just that, and who did that so that we could have a relationship with Him again, and the God who is powerful enough to raise Jesus out of the grave, defeating sin and death, can SURELY, EASILY, NO QUESTION ABOUT IT, keep the promises He's made to me and can SURELY, NO QUESTION ABOUT IT, meet my needs.

And, God can SURELY, NO QUESTION ABOUT IT, keep the promises He's made to YOU, and can SURELY, NO QUESTION ABOUT IT, meet YOUR needs, too.

And when the Holy Spirit spoke this to me during the worship night, helped me realize how I was afraid of being disappointed therefore not fully trusting God, and reminded me of God's everlasting faithfulness to His children, that God truly will NEVER, EVER, EVER let me down, I was overjoyed, reassured, encouraged, and strengthened.

I knew God had my back, and that no matter what happened, I would praise God for His past, present, and future faithfulness to me.

I also realized something else a few days after this moment that I feel is really, REALLY important to know.

There are different levels and amounts of trust. And it's really easy for people to place their trust in something, or someone, they can SEE because it feels safer. When people choose to withhold trust or not place as much confidence in something or someone, what they're trying to do is avoid the possibility of and the pain of being disappointed, of being LET DOWN, by human nature, insufficiency and inadequacy.

But trusting God, trusting IN God, means being confident in Him and in His ability to do EVERYTHING He says He will do and be for us EVERYTHING He says He will be.

But, if I trust God only partly, mostly, or half-heartedly, then I will NEVER be able to be fully confident in my God to keep the promises He's made to me, EVEN when He is the God who has NEVER, NOT ONCE, NOT EVER, broken a SINGLE promise to His children.

And if we as Christians have the same expectation of God as we do of people, we will always reserve part of our trust, and therefore part of our love, from God out of the fear of being let down.

And this we cannot do.

If we find ourselves not trusting God because we fear that God will disappoint us, then we have forgotten the unchanging, consistent character of God, and we have allowed our ears to be filled with what the world preaches at us – "you can trust people, just not enough to let them hurt you."

But THIS is what the Bible says in Psalm 25:3a of trusting in God,

"No one who trusts in you will ever be disgraced." (Psalm 25:3a, NLT)

Now, what the Bible doesn't say is that our lives will be easy or pain-free or without difficulty when we trust in God.

And let me be real, y'all. Sometimes, trusting in God is SCARY. Sometimes, trusting in God makes literally NO SENSE at all. Sometimes, trusting in God has painful, stretching, testing, and confusing.

BUT, NO ONE, NOT ONE SINGLE PERSON, WHO TRUSTS IN GOD, WHO PUTS THEIR FAITH IN GOD, WHO BELIEVES THAT GOD IS WHO HE SAYS HE IS, THAT GOD IS A PROMISE KEEPING GOD (and this fact has not changed since the beginning of time) WILL EVER BE DISGRACED. NOT EVER.

Jeremiah 17:7-8 says

"Blessed is the person who trusts in the Lord and has made the Lord their hope and confidence. They are like a tree planted along a riverbank, with its roots reaching deep into the water – a tree not bothered by the heat or worried by long months of drought."

God is GOOD, y'all.

And it is BECAUSE He is GOOD, BECAUSE He is LOVE, and BECAUSE He is ABLE and CAPABLE of fulfilling ALL of the promises He makes, WHEN THAT IS ALL HE HAS EVER DONE, we can FULLY trust in God and be COMPLETELY confident that God can and will keep His word to us.

PERIOD.

Yes, Lord, you are GOOD. You ARE the King of MY heart, and you will never, NEVER, let me down.

Amen and amen.