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Politics

5 Spots To Vacation If You're As Great As The President

Work hard-ish, play harder.

Aditya Iyer

Apr 09, 2018

University of Washington

191

5 Spots To Vacation If You're As Great As The President

Pixabay

Running short on vacation ideas for your next break? Fortunately for you, the president himself has quite the selection of glorious vacation spots! While some of these might not work out for you, they sure are prime examples of where you could go to visit if you were as great as he was!

1. Mar-A-Lago

Let's get the obvious one out of the way here. If there's one thing Trump loves about the presidency, its how many times he gets to go golfing. Since his inauguration, Trump has visited the place a total of 16 times. His resort of choice might not be a realistic vacation spot for you, but man does he love that place.

2. Trump Tower Grill

Trump might not have the best relationship with the Latino community, but he apparently really loves taco bowls. Naturally, Trump Tower Grill has the best ones because come on, did you really think Mexicans could do it better than Trump?

3. NRA Headquarters

Trump might not be on perfect terms with the NRA, but man does he love their support. He knows he's got to keep the gun nuts on his side, and what better way to do that than through the Nutty Republicans Association?

4. Ivanka's Bedroom

Melania's not getting any younger, so why not move down a generation? It's not incest if she's a 10/10, right? RIGHT???

5. The White House

Yes, Trump's favorite spot is none other than the White House itself. Trump treats the presidency like the ultimate vacation, sitting back and giggling as America slowly destroys itself a little bit more with every passing day. Hopefully, for us, that vacation will come to an end sooner rather than later.

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5 Spots To Vacation If You're As Great As The President

Work hard-ish, play harder.

1. Mar-A-Lago

2. Trump Tower Grill

3. NRA Headquarters

4. Ivanka's Bedroom

5. The White House

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Because have you ever had to endure grilling your foot on a George Foreman?

1. When he just wanted bacon from his George Foreman grill

2. When he had money (and Jan) issues

3. When he got upstaged at Phyllis' wedding

4. When he unintentionally saved Meredith from rabies

5. When he wore a "bisexual" suit

6. When he had to apologize to Jesus

7. When his GPS drove him into a lake

8. When he had to deal with Ryan as his boss

9. When he couldn't fulfill his most generous empty promise

10. When this happened

11. When he struggled with a X-Mas break up

12. When he had to defend his generosity

13. When he threw a classy Christmas party for Holly but she had a boyfriend

14. When he had to stand up to peer pressure

15. When Toby was "Toby-ish"

This isn't just for the single Pringles out there either, folks

Run Around Clanging Pots and Pans in Everyone's Face

Eat the Last Few Pigs in a Blanket

Pop Twelve White Grapes

Burn Something

Smash Things Against a Wall

Spontaneously Begin an Irish Jig

Call Your Mother

Throw a Coffee Table Out a Window

Sing "Auld Lang Syne" at the Top of Your Lungs

Do Some Squats

Swan Dive into a Nearly Freezing Body of Water

Take a Shot

Time to be merry and bright.

"First Noel" by Leslie Odom, Jr

"A Holly Jolly Christmas" by Burl Ives

"Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas" by Kelly Clarkson

"All I Want for Christmas Is You" by Mariah Carey

"Christmas (Baby Please Come Home" by Michael Buble

"Last Christmas" by Taylor Swift

"The Christmas Song" by Josh Groban

"White Christmas" by Idina Menzel

"O Holy Night" by David Archuleta

"Believe" by Josh Groban

"Les cloches du hameau" by Celine Dion

Or at least try to do.

1. I will wake up (sorta) on time for class.

2. I will look decent for class.

3. I will go to the gym more.

4. I will go to the library and study more.

5. I will meet new people.

For those long nights that turn into mornings when the struggle is real.

1. Walk in motivated and ready to rock

2. Disappointed you let it get this bad

3. Distracted: When a 10-Minute Break Becomes an Hour

4. When the Yearning for Sleep Sneaks Up

5. In the words of Lorelai Gilmore "Coffee, Coffee, Coffee"

Oh, so done.

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