We had it all figured out. The Pinterest wedding, the notepad filled on my phone with baby names, and my entire future planned out with him… and then the “him”, out of nowhere, didn’t pan out.

It happens to the best of us and no matter how hard we try to avoid the absolute torrential downpour of pain and heartbreak, there it is. Not a day passes where I don’t think about him or feel angry for some of the things he did, I even still reach out to him from time to time, but here’s a super novel idea. I don’t hate my ex-boyfriend. I still, genuinely, wish him the utmost happiness. Frankly, it’s been a year and the love hasn’t totally faded and I’m not quite sure it ever will.

He was everything my family and I had ever dreamed up. Handsome, successful, the life of the party and he had a damn cute dog that I fell in love with too. Sure, life goes on and we’ve both moved on, but I will never hate him for who he is or what happened. I’ll never wish horrible things on him like a psycho new girlfriend (but could be entertaining) or the bubonic plague (maybe just I.B.S).

I pray daily that he finds someone that makes him as happy as I forever wish I had been able to. I pray that there is another girl out there worthy of the immensity of his love and adoration. I pray for him and his eternal happiness, and nothing less. People change, situations change but it doesn’t make the reality of how intense our three years together really was any less and I can’t think of a single thing I regret because it gave me the memories, and it gave me him.

One day, he will realize how beautiful what he has to offer truly is and I hope he realizes how thankful I am for the time we shared. Hating him would only stall the healing process and tarnish what was once a perfect life. True life, I don’t hate my ex, I don’t think I ever could.