There’s been quite an uproar about the recent presidential election, but as I’m sure you’re aware, a cocktail party is no place for politics! No matter how relentlessly the topic comes up, the last thing you want to do is polarize the guests. With that in mind, here are 15 nonpartisan bits of trivia to help you maintain the course of cordial conversation.
1. Watermelon is a vegetable.
A simple statement, yes, but it’s bound to spark at least 20 minutes’ worth of good-natured, frivolous debate.2. Beaver, Oklahoma, is the Cow Chip Throwing capital of the world.
It has a sort of silencing effect when one of your guests dwells a tad too much on his alleged Southern chic. (I've nothing against being nonpartisan and low-key savage.)
3. Bridesmaids were originally decoys to confuse evil spirits about who was getting married.
A helpful thought for your recently engaged companion.4. "Alpi tokhes" means "butt dialing” in Yiddish.
If someone tries to dismiss your impressive lexicon as irrelevant, tell him
to read the NY Times article about it and then move on to other guests,
leaving him in an uncultured stupor.
5. Dolphins like to look at themselves in the mirror.
The woman checking her lipstick in her dessert spoon will probably take it as a compliment.6. It’s illegal to collect seaweed in New Hampshire.
Every state has its customs. If your South Carolinian interlocutor starts to poke fun, just remind her that she can’t keep a horse in a bathtub back home without breaking the law.7. People tend to make better decisions when they need to urinate.
Mention it offhand while generously pouring your companion a seventh glass of bourbon.8. Albert Einstein preferred not to wear socks.
It may prove entertaining if, after saying this, you look pointedly down at a guest’s argyle-revealing loafers and inquire whether he read the fine print on the invitation.
9. In ancient China, people used to keep dogs up their sleeves for extra warmth.
A resourceful suggestion, perhaps, for the scantily-clad woman who claims your house is too cold.
10. Without its tail on the ground, a kangaroo cannot hop.
If you say it while warming some brandy and looking out a window, your companion will probably think of it as an impressive aphorism.
11. British public toilets were voted worst worldwide in a 1992 survey.
Not that any guest is expected to complain about your porcelain throne, but it’s worth having this helpful comparison on hand nonetheless.12. It’s bad luck in Germany to wish someone happy birthday in advance.
This functions as an all-around discouragement for guests to imply that another is aging.
13. Jellyfish are 95 percent water.
Useful in the event that the model from Switzerland has qualms about her caloric intake while reading your menu.
14. A handshake transfers more germs than a kiss.
Be careful using this in greeting; your companion may take it to heart and later bestow upon you an unexpectedly intimate form of goodbye.
15. Finally, Nepal is the only country without a rectangular flag.
A soothing reminder that there's always something, for better or for worse, that sets a nation apart.