My heart is thumping. I can hear their voices getting louder and louder with each step I take. Every couple of steps I stop and look around. This is me. This is my legacy. This is my past, my present, and my future. I have been through so much just to get here. I'll just let that sink in for a moment. I have been closing my eyes for a couple of minutes, and when I open them again they'll be there, as always. "Ready in three," they say, and I flash the brightest smile. This is what I was born to do. "Three, two…" I say, excitement filling my eyes. We all take what seems to be hours to look at each other, finally screaming "ONE!" in unison. I high five the three of them and run to grab my guitar.
I saw her last night and I will see her every night until July. She's always the one I run to when I'm away from home. She's been there for me ever since this all started, and together we have conquered the most beautiful places in this world. With her, I've seen a million faces and I've rocked them all. I repeat those last ten words night after night, and I had never believed them as much as I do now.
I run up the stairs. The guys are already there. I'm the one they're waiting for. My three friends and sixty thousand people more. I start to feel the pressure: the pressure to achieve perfection. I know it doesn't matter though because I can count on all of them, as I do night after night. I walk through a narrow tunnel, listening to them scream my name-music to my ears. I take a quick glance at them all. I can't believe they're all here for us; for me. Suddenly, everything quiets down. It's like I'm all alone in this world. I take one last step, and I'm there. I take a bow and smile, enabling my ears to hear their voices again. I look around for a while and wave at them, looking at every single one of their faces. They all seem to be very excited to be here.
Suddenly, I hear three familiar clicks coming from the other side of the stage, and I know it's my cue. I can feel my voice fly all over the place as I watch thousands of mouths move in synchrony with mine. Time flies by, and I'm getting really familiarized with all these faces. Sadly, it's only for tonight, as always. As the last few minutes go by, my smile starts to fade away and my legs wobble, but I have to give it all until the end. That's what they're here for and it's what I'm supposed to do. The lights go down and I close my eyes once again, taking a moment to hear them scream my name even louder. I smile and thank God for my life.
Just when I think I'm all done for the night, I hear numerous taps on my window. I fell asleep in the car again. I roll down my window just to find a young girl standing there, flashing the brightest smile I had ever seen. She's holding a picture I know very well. It's one of my favorite pictures of me and the guys. Slowly, she approaches me a little bit more with each passing second. When she's reached my window, she slowly lifts her hand up and hands me a pen, asking me to sign her photograph. "How are you, pretty girl?" I ask her, and she looks down at her feet. "Excited", she answers, looking at me with such happiness that I can't help but smile. "Here you go", I say, handing her the photo.
She smiles once again and then waves, saying goodbye. I roll up my window and close my eyes. I love it when these things happen to me. They make me feel loved for a while, and that's exactly what I need. The problem is that this almost never happens. Random meet-ups are so weird and beautiful I wish I could keep the memories forever. But instead, I have to meet the people who pay to meet me. And I don't find that interesting at all.
Me and the guys have been away from home for months now, and the homesickness starts to kick in. Sometimes I just like to sit alone in the room thinking about how far I've come and how much this is doing for me and my family. I think about the great things I have achieved for them and I smile, just like every night. I get out of the room before loneliness comes back and I spend some time with the guys.
This has been just another night in my endless journey, but it's just as special as any other. It's just a matter of weeks now before the tour ends and I've loved every minute of it, but I'm ready to live my life at a slow pace again and enjoy it with the people that are close to me, although I know it won't be long until I come back to my rock star life.
