We grow up learning, “Treat others how you want to be treated.” And it makes complete sense. Why be rude and expect kindness back? But what we commonly forget, is that people do not necessary treat you back the way you treat them. Just because we might show gratitude or helpfulness to them, doesn’t mean that will guarantee them doing the same back.

It’s a sad thought, I know, but in recent experiences, I have learned to remember that you can treat someone like a prince or princess, but in no rule book does it tell them to do the same to you. Now, to make this article less negative, I’ll take a more positive approach, which has also helped this these past couple weeks.

At first, I expected all my friends to come ask me if I was OK or spontaneously take me out because that’s what I would have or have done for them when they were at a low point. Unfortunately, of the five or six people I expected that from, maybe one or two were by their phone in case I needed someone to talk to. I was upset but then thought to myself, when these people were in need, I didn’t have to go be by their side at all times. In fact, no one even told me to. I just did because I thought it was the right thing to do and honestly I felt good that people could depend on me.

It’s a weird thought, but not everyone in the world wants to be a helping hand. Some people may have better things to do, which is fine – every man for himself. Yet, we often forget the people who are constantly there for us and instead always remember the people we wish were there for us. I look back, and in our own household, our parents are constantly making sure we are OK, but we barely acknowledge it, because we want our friends to be making that phone call, for some reason, instead of going to the people who will always have our backs.

My mom, day in and out, calls me even when she knows I’m having a good day, just for that 1 percent chance that something went wrong and I need someone to talk to. Our parents are there for us more than we are for them; in this case, I have found that I don’t treat them how I want to be treated all the time. I take them for granted because I know they’ll always be there. That sounds terrible, but for every chore or task they ask us to do which we show an attitude for, we are taking them for granted, because if it were the other way around, they’d do anything to help us reduce our stress.

I have learned that as much as I was upset that some of my friends didn’t help me the way I wanted them to, I recognized who will always be there for me. And I used the example of parents, and this doesn’t necessarily pertain to every person out there, but even if five people forget about you through a rough time, there will always be those one or two people.

I write this article as a reflection of a time in my life in which I wanted help for the first time but didn’t receive what I expected. This by no means changes the way I’ll act for these same friends when they’re in need because I learned to treat people how I’d want to be treated. It just gave me a perspective of who to go to when I am in need of a shoulder to lean on. And maybe my readers won't grasp a single thing I’ve said, and must go through an obstacle to learn it, but I urge all of you to think about who truly has your back and who doesn’t; because at the end of the day, it helps a hell of a lot more knowing for sure that a certain somebody will be there for you no matter what.