Imagine going to an environment with 1,100 people to one with over 19,000.
You might think that they're literally insane which they are, and they're me. Did I mention I'm a commuter too? Yes, I'm that crazy.
It never registered in my head what a change I was signing up for when I became a student at The University Of Connecticut, and it's way more than just getting adjusted to our campus. It's walking on campus without your best friend or melting down every time you mess up, because you feel like you're doing everything wrong and that you're not going to make it at this new school. It's realizing some of your professors see you as a number and not a person that they're teaching their passion to. It's realizing most people on campus already have their friend groups and you don't have one.
To be clear, I don't regret my decision I'm just having a really hard time adjusting to a brand new atmosphere with new people and teachers.
This is the kind of adjustment that takes much longer than a week, and I don't mean memorizing the campus. I mean learning where to park, how to manage the intensity of my classes, and making friends.
In the past week, I have gotten lost, missed homework assignments, did homework last minute, along with having various meltdowns. I know all of this is a lot and it should be because it is a lot and has been a lot for me to take in, and attempt to adjust to. There is always so much going on throughout a big campus and it's so easy to feel lost and confused without even trying to go anywhere.
The positive is, I get to experience a whole new world of things I've never experienced before which usually means things can get messy occasionally.
Like for one, since I'm a commuter I get to drive the 60 minutes to campus every morning which sucks when traffic is heavy but is super peaceful when I get to see the sunset and rise on such a beautiful campus. I also get to take classes that are hard BUT they are teaching me so much and laying out the foundation for my career and growth in writing. I may not have a lot of friends yet, but everyone has been really kind to me in each of my major classes which have helped me feel a bit better about things here at UConn.
I know I'm still at the stage of major school adjustment but I believe I made the right choice and I will reach my potential socially, creatively, and educationally. I have a new mindset coming into this third week of school and that is to just be myself and try my very best to stay organized and do well in class. After I achieve those things in my own life on campus everything else will begin to fall into place right alongside my goals.