The move to switch colleges isn’t for everyone; the idea of starting over – for the second time – leaves individuals feeling as if they’re staring into a void. Imagine you’re perched atop a cliff trying to decide between enduring what you despise, or embracing what you don’t know. This emulates how many first year students feel. On the cusp of completing my first semester at Northeastern, my experience validates these preconceived notions. I walked into the school not knowing what to expect. Coming upon Thanksgiving Break, I know my choice gave me a new beginning and brighter outlook on my own future.
Post-transferring, high school friends reached out to me, telling me their stories since graduation and seeking advice to see whether or not they should make the jump as well. Though incapable of making the choice for them – no two people are alike – I know sharing stories brings the greatest of comfort to those in the midst of uncertainty. With that said, I wish to convey my experience thus far, for the road of a transfer student is far from easy, but one that's never taken alone.
One must open up to the people most beloved; I promise they’re listening. A year from the initial conversation with my own loved ones, I’m acutely aware my family and friends gave me the confidence to say, “this situation isn’t for me.” This statement isn’t an all-encompassing one; I failed to let many loved ones in on my unhappiness, and now look back on that decision with regret. Blood runs thicker than water just as true friends stick by you in your darkest hours. In times such as these, the added support system becomes less of a luxury and more of a necessity.
Transferring schools should be a last resort. Period. Everyone needs time to adjust to new environments, and very few feel immediately at ease in new situations. Nevertheless, base your decisions moving forward on what will enable you to thrive, not what reads well on a piece of paper. As a survivor of clinical depression, I left my former university after one semester to come home and recollect myself. My decision rendered many speechless, as I gave no outward indication of depression, and exited my former university without a word of the demons I battled in my own mind. I share this because choices made without mental clarity become the choices we regret most in life; thus, I impress upon those reading to ask yourself, “do I need to adjust, need a change of scenery, or need to take a break entirely?”
Closing the book on the past, the last bit of my tale and advice brings me to my current situation. Coming from a newly adjusted student, I will say this: BE PATIENT WITH YOURSELF. Acclimating takes time, energy and a willingness to embrace your surroundings. Get involved, talk to people, and never be afraid to call on loved ones when you feel low. Just like freshman year, the first month will possess many trials and tribulations. Your friend group changes 500+ times in one week, you’ll be asked, “why did you transfer?” more times than you’ll be able to count, and there will be moments you second guess every choice you’ve ever made. Believe it or not, that makes you just like any other transfer student. The lesson lies in knowing when to take a step back and allow yourself to be human.
For those asking yourself, “college should be the best time of my life, what’s wrong with me?” you’re one of millions. As a society, we paint this glorious picture of constant parties and casual hookups when the topic of college arises; how far from the truth that is. College tests you; expect hills and valleys, not smooth sailing. When hardships attempt to quell your resolve, know that for every dark day, there’s a brighter one around the corner. 'Til that brighter day dawns, just breathe. You’re doing the best you can.
