Toxic Relationships And The Reality Of Friendships In College | The Odyssey Online
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Toxic Relationships And The Reality Of Friendships In College

What it means to be a good friend, and the kind of people that I want to stick around.

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Toxic Relationships And The Reality Of Friendships In College
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One of the biggest sources of anxiety when starting your freshman year of college is making new friends. For many people, this is the first year in a long time they will have to form relationships with people they have never met before, and for many this is a daunting task. As this year starts winding down to an end, I have had a chance to reflect on the types of people that I have met at this school, and the connections I've created with a number of people.

My thoughts range from regret, to numbness, to sadness, to happiness, and to hope. You meet a lot of people your freshman year with a variety of personalities, quirks, opinions, and habits. What is important to realize is who the people are that you should dedicate your time to, and those who you should stop putting so much effort and hard work into. At the end of the day, it doesn't matter how different someone may be from you or how other people perceive them -- it's how you get along with them and whether or not they show you the respect and time of day that you deserve.

I remember the first few weeks of school. Oh, what a time to be alive. On the weekends you would go out, start up conversations with complete strangers, and come back to your dorm with about 15 new contacts in your phone. For a few days, maybe, you would text these same people for party information or just make small talk, seeking out someone who might just become a new BFF. But as time goes on, it becomes relatively simple to see who is reciprocating and who is not. I can honestly say that the friends I had during the first few months of school are not people I would be able to casually text today and ask to grab lunch or hang out.

I've come to the conclusion that I will no longer put up with people that aren't worth my time. This might sound aggressive and a bit severe, but after coming to this realization I have become a much happier person, and a lot more satisfied with my friendships. In no way am I someone who would be described as "annoying" or "clingy" by any standard (at least I hope not), but if someone consistently takes hours to reply to my texts, or if their phone always miraculously dies when I am trying to get in touch with them, or they always cancel plans, well...then they obviously aren't someone who I want to be friends with. One of the rudest things someone can do is ignore you (that, or post a Snapchat story and leave you waiting on a text back).

I urge all of you to think about the friends you have made in college and whether or not you have been a good friend yourself. I think everyone has been in a situation where someone doesn't put the same effort into a relationship, and to be blunt, it sucks. But knowing this now, I am ending this year with a handful of people that care about me and show me the respect that I show them. I would much rather have a few friends like this than a lot of those who are the contrary.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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