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20 Timeless 'Golden Girls' One-Liners Perfect To Drop In 21st-Century Conversations

These four golden ladies always had a comeback for everything.

Zachary Kyle Winograd

Mar 20, 2019

The Narrative

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20 Timeless 'Golden Girls' One-Liners Perfect To Drop In 21st-Century Conversations

Touchstone Television

Since it's premiere in 1985, "The Golden Girls" has managed it maintain it's popularity for over 33 years and counting. Like "Sex and the City," millennials love to decide who's who in their friend groups (I'm definitely a Dorothy with a hint of Blanche). There's also hundreds and hundreds of merchandise items, T-shirts, and DVD collections to celebrate your love for "the Golden Girls" — there was even a "Golden Girls" restaurant in New York City (which is sadly, now closed).

Though the best part of "The Golden Girls" wasn't just the girls themselves, it was the incredible writing by Susan Harris (the show's creator) and the writing team as a whole that brought the girls to life. Here are a collection of twenty quotes to use in your everyday life, print one out and stick it on your wall.

1. "I could vomit just looking at you!" - Dorothy

2. "Eat dirt and die, trash" - Blanche

3. "Not for you, nursey nurse nurse nurse!" - Rose

4. "Jealousy is a very ugly thing, Dorothy. And so are you in anything backless!" - Sophia

5. "No, Blanche, she's upset because they keep changing the taste of Coke" - Dorothy

6. D: "Woo! it is really coming down!" R: "What's coming down?"D: "The Liberace marquee at Ceaser's Palace" - Dorothy & Rose

7. D: "Oh, I'm so nervous. Have you ever given a eulogy?" R: "You mean at a funeral?"D: "No, Rose at a pie eating contest!" - Dorothy & Rose

8. D: "Your kidney?"B: "My kidney"R: "Why would she need a kidney?"D: "TO FEED THE CAT, ROSE!" - Dorothy, Blanche & Rose

"Thank you, you bed hopping relic" - Sophia

10. “Isn't it a fact that you have a drawer full of retirement home brochures and you're just waiting for the first sign of dribble on your mother's chin to lock her away forever?” - Rose

11. B: “Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go take a long, hot, steamy bath, with just enough water to barely cover my perky bosoms.” S: “You're only gonna sit in an inch of water?” - Blanche & Sophia

12."If that doesn't fill the void, nothing will" - Dorothy

13. “Jean is a nice person, she happens to like girls instead of guys. Some people like cats instead of dogs. Frankly, I'd rather live with a lesbian than a cat. Unless a lesbian sheds that I don't know.” - Sophia

14. "Oh, Rose, please. I don’t even know why fools fall in love.” - Dorothy

15. "Go to sleep, sweetheart. Pray fro brains" - Dorothy

16. "Go hug a landmine" - Dorothy

17. "Stanley, you truly are one chromosome away from being a potato" - Dorothy

18. B: "You no-good, backstabbing Jezebel. I demand you show me that paper!"D: "I'm sorry, flattery doesn't work!" - Dorothy and Blanche

19. "Can you believe that backstabbing slut?" - Rose

20. "CONDOMS, ROSE! CONDOMS! CONDOMS! CONDOMS!" - Dorothy

8 Things That Anyone Who Went To A Small School Knows

Sometimes bigger isn't always better.

Essex County, NJ

270

blogspot

I went to a small high school, like 120-people-in-my-graduating-class small. It definitely had some good and some bad, and if you also went to a small high school, I’m sure you’ll relate to the things that I went through.

1. If something happens, everyone knows about it

Who hooked up with whom at the party? Yeah, heard about that an hour after it happened. You failed a test? Sorry, saw on Twitter last period. Facebook fight or, God forbid, real fight? It was on half the class’ Snapchat story half an hour ago. No matter what you do, someone will know about it.

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Student Life

12 Most Annoying Things About Working In Sales

No, I can't help you.

Oakland University

1643

Working with the public can be a job, in and of itself. Some people are just plain rude for no reason. But regardless of how your day is going, always having to be in the best of moods, or at least act like it... right?

1. When a customer wants to return a product, hands you the receipt, where is printed "ALL SALES ARE FINAL" in all caps.

2. Just because you might be having a bad day, and you're in a crappy mood, doesn't make it okay for you to yell at me or be rude to me. I'm a person with feelings, just like you.

3. People refusing to be put on hold when a customer is standing right in front of you. Oh, how I wish I could just hang up on you!

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Entertainment

11 Things That Happen When You Suffer From Resting B*tch Face

It's just my face, I swear.

Christopher Newport University

771

Hercampus.com

RBF, or resting b*tch face, is a serious condition that many people suffer from worldwide. Suffers are often bombarded with daily questions such as "Are you OK?" and "Why are you so mad?" If you have RBF, you've probably had numerous people tell you to "just smile!"

While this question trend can get annoying, there are a couple of pros to having RBF.

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Lifestyle

16 Things Blondes Are Tired Of Hearing

Please hold your blonde joke.

Rutgers University

650

Yify

Another day, another Elle Woods comment. Can’t us blondes get through the day without someone harping at us over the typical stereotypes about who we are? I never understood why a person was judged based upon the hair color they were born with, or the hair color they choose to have (unless you dye your hair blue like Kylie Jenner, I’m still trying to understand why that’s a trend). Nevertheless, as it should be assumed, not everyone is the same. Not all blondes like bright colors and Lilly Pulitzer, and not all blondes claim to identify with Marilyn Monroe. I think the best suggestion to give to people before they make such radical claims is to stop judging a book by its cover. Or in this case, stop judging a blonde by her hair color.

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Recommended for you

20 Timeless 'Golden Girls' One-Liners Perfect To Drop In 21st-Century Conversations

These four golden ladies always had a comeback for everything.

In This Article:

1. "I could vomit just looking at you!" - Dorothy

2. "Eat dirt and die, trash" - Blanche

3. "Not for you, nursey nurse nurse nurse!" - Rose

4. "Jealousy is a very ugly thing, Dorothy. And so are you in anything backless!" - Sophia

5. "No, Blanche, she's upset because they keep changing the taste of Coke" - Dorothy

6. D: "Woo! it is really coming down!" R: "What's coming down?"D: "The Liberace marquee at Ceaser's Palace" - Dorothy & Rose

​7. D: "Oh, I'm so nervous. Have you ever given a eulogy?" R: "You mean at a funeral?"D: "No, Rose at a pie eating contest!" - Dorothy & Rose

8. D: "Your kidney?"B: "My kidney"R: "Why would she need a kidney?"D: "TO FEED THE CAT, ROSE!" - Dorothy, Blanche & Rose

"Thank you, you bed hopping relic" - Sophia

10. ​“Isn't it a fact that you have a drawer full of retirement home brochures and you're just waiting for the first sign of dribble on your mother's chin to lock her away forever?” - Rose​

11. B: “Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go take a long, hot, steamy bath, with just enough water to barely cover my perky bosoms.” S: “You're only gonna sit in an inch of water?” - Blanche & Sophia

12."If that doesn't fill the void, nothing will" - Dorothy

13. “Jean is a nice person, she happens to like girls instead of guys. Some people like cats instead of dogs. Frankly, I'd rather live with a lesbian than a cat. Unless a lesbian sheds that I don't know.” - Sophia

14. "Oh, Rose, please. I don’t even know why fools fall in love.” - Dorothy

15. "Go to sleep, sweetheart. Pray fro brains" - Dorothy

16. "Go hug a landmine" - Dorothy

17. "Stanley, you truly are one chromosome away from being a potato" - Dorothy

18. B: "You no-good, backstabbing Jezebel. I demand you show me that paper!"D: "I'm sorry, flattery doesn't work!" - Dorothy and Blanche

19. "Can you believe that backstabbing slut?" - Rose

20. "CONDOMS, ROSE! CONDOMS! CONDOMS! CONDOMS!" - Dorothy

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Sometimes bigger isn't always better.

1. If something happens, everyone knows about it

2. Never getting to be invisible

3. Knowing every single thing about every single person in the town

4. New kids are a big deal

5. It’s hard to make new friends

6. On that note ... the dating pool is even smaller!

7. Teachers are weirdly close to their students

8. It forced you to make friends out of school

"I'm hopeless and awkward and desperate for love"

1. That Time He Tested Out His Flirting Skills and This Happened

2. When He Was Willing to Do Anything to Avoid Confrontation

3. When He Couldn't Handle Awkward, Emotional Situations

4. How He Reacted Whenever His Friends Ignored Him

5. All of the Times He Worried About His Failing Love Life

6. Whenever He Tried to Whip Himself Into Shape

7. How He Handled New People and New Experiences

8. Whenever His Friends Got Annoying, He Was Always the Voice of Reason

9. He Always Knew How to Jam

10. He Finds a Way to Make Any Situation More Fun

No, I can't help you.

1. When a customer wants to return a product, hands you the receipt, where is printed "ALL SALES ARE FINAL" in all caps.

2. Just because you might be having a bad day, and you're in a crappy mood, doesn't make it okay for you to yell at me or be rude to me. I'm a person with feelings, just like you.

3. People refusing to be put on hold when a customer is standing right in front of you. Oh, how I wish I could just hang up on you!

4. Having the same conversations over and over again! To be honest I really don't even want to talk to you right now, or have this fake ass smile on my face!

5. Always having to have a smile on your face. I promise I'm not as happy as I may look!

6. Customers not understanding that sometimes, mistakes happen. I am a human being, we all mess up sometimes!

7. Having the boss from hell, it's their way or the highway! Even though I did my job correctly and efficiently, if I don't do it the exact way you do, I'm a piece of shit.

8. Having coworker who don't help out, who bend the rules just enough to screw you over.

9. Having to be at work after closing because a customer is taking forever and half! Not like I'd like to go home or anything!

10. Having shitty hours and more shifts than you asked for. Just because we don't have enough workers, doesn't mean I want to pick up every shift that you cant cover, oh great boss of mine!

11. Not having time for a social life. It gets old saying, "I can't I have work..." Every day of the week!

12. Having that lazy costumer who can't do anything for themselves... no please I'll get that, it's no problem at all!

It's just my face, I swear.

1. When you meet new people, they automatically assume you hate them or are rude.

2. People are constantly asking you if you're OK.

3. After being friends with someone for a while, they confess to you, "I thought you were so mean when I first met you," or, "I thought you hated me."

4. You get told to smile more, but they don't understand how scary that would be.

5. You're always labeled as seeming "judgy."

6. Passing a friend with your RBF in full force and not realizing you just shot them a death glare.

7. Being sarcastic, but everyone thinks you're outright rude.

8. Not knowing how mean you really look until you see a picture of yourself in resting face.

9. Your apologies never sound sincere because of your emotionless face.

10. Your "mad face" scares you.

11. And, lastly, people are constantly asking you if you are happy or having a good time because you look bored to death.

Please hold your blonde joke.

1. "Is Elle Woods your spirit animal?"

2. "Is that your natural hair color?"

3. "Oh wow, you get good grades at school?"

4. "You must really like the color pink!"

5. "You’re probably not into sports, right?"

6. "You must have such a bubbly personality."

7. "Your wardrobe must consist of all things preppy."

8. "What sorority are you in?"

9. "You were probably a cheerleader in high school."

7. D: "Oh, I'm so nervous. Have you ever given a eulogy?" R: "You mean at a funeral?"D: "No, Rose at a pie eating contest!" - Dorothy & Rose

10. “Isn't it a fact that you have a drawer full of retirement home brochures and you're just waiting for the first sign of dribble on your mother's chin to lock her away forever?” - Rose

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