"You'll never be good enough."
"Nobody likes you anyway."
"You'll never find love."
It's 12:28 pm on a Wednesday afternoon and all of these voices are clamoring in my head, making me crawl back yet again under my sheets, utterly defeated. I've cried for two and a half hours. My first class was at 7:45 am. I don't know what he/she was on, but whoever said that sticks and stones could break their bones instead of words was so wrong.
Dear, darling voices in my head,
I know the last thing you want is for me to prosper. You want to see me fail again and again, sucked into your eternal vortex of darkness. You want me to continue crashing down, letting you eat away at me. But you're not getting what you want. I refuse to participate in your mind games or to allow you to walk all over my emotions. You isolated me from my friends, my family, my professors. Some days are harder than others, but you never failed to make a down day sink even lower. I wake up every morning expecting to be ready to do life happily but you just hate letting that happen, don't you?
Sorry for raining on your parade, but here's to me taking back control of my life. Here's to me silencing all the horrible things you say about me in an attempt to drag me down to your level, because you know what? I am good enough. I am worth it. I am loved.
I don't care what you have to say anymore, because I like me just fine. I plan on staying the same awkward, sarcastic, slightly potty mouthed delight that I am.. Cracks and all. So if you're not okay with that, please, exit stage left.
Dear, darling voices in my head,
It's 2:49 am on a Saturday morning, and this is my battle cry- for the only war I have to win is the one against myself.
Cheers,
-The girl who won't let you win this time-