I am so stressed out I would rather just curl up in a ball under my blanket and sleep until I am 90 and dying. I don't want to have to write two essays, a presentation, and now an article for people to read on a late-night binge on the internet. I'm not feeling funny or happy or creative--I feel like literal poop.
I also don't get why people aren't allowed to just sit around and grieve for a little. What kind of dysfunctional society says "Sorry for your loss," and then forces you to get over it so they can grade a couple of papers that say nothing about you as a person or your capabilities as a student? Actually, nevermind as a student--I'm a human and I'm going through extremely weak human emotions and being forced to forge through them. If I keep it up anymore, I'm definitely going to a psych ward.
I am tired. I am immensely sad. I'm angry at how life works. AND I'm SO frustrated that no one seems to understand that I need a break. I want to keep my stress at bay and feel happy. I want to smile and mean it. I want to see happy things and feel happy they exist. I can't do that because I can't stop being sad but I can't feel that sadness and get through it because I have things to do. Does that seem normal to anyone, really?
I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemies to have an animal fall in love with them for 11 years and then have to hold them while they die. Like literally have them snuggling into you for dear life and then losing that life in half a second. It's awful and I'm messed up right now.
I need a break.