I miss you every single day, grandma. Watching you suffer through Alzheimer's Disease has been one the most difficult things I have ever gone through. I hate seeing you scared, I hate seeing grandpa alone at family parties, and I hate that you are here, but not actually here. Every time I have seen you this year, we talk about how you look beautiful and I get to ask you how you are but that's about as far as it goes. It’s been well over a year since I've been able to talk to you not as a stranger coming to see you, but as your granddaughter. So I'm going to tell you about my life, grandma.
I graduated high school almost a year and half ago. You weren't able to make it to my graduation, but that's okay. You watched a live video of me. It was a great day. I got to walk on stage with so many of my peers that I have known most of life and have this special day with them, then come home to celebrate my accomplishment with all of my friends and family, including you! I loved that day.
Last time we talked, I was going to go to college to become a Physician's Assistant. But that changed really fast. I took one term of a chemistry class and decided that not only am I terrible at science, but I really hate it! It took me a little while but after a bit I was able to finally find a new direction. I want to be a teacher. It was always my back-up plan, and I figured there was probably a reason for that. So now I'm going to school to become a high school teacher. I would like to teach social studies so I am getting my bachelors in sociology and then I will attend graduate school to get my master's in education. I'm really excited about it.
Along with school, I am doing really well. My first term of college I did awful. That chemistry class killed me. I got a poor GPA. But winter term, I found a new motivation and worked super hard and was able to get a 3.8! And after that, I found even more motivation to work hard and was able to achieve a 4.0 spring term. I'm super proud of myself, grandma.
I continued my job of coaching gymnastics. Gymnastics has always been my passion, you know that. It feels good to be in the gym, around the sport and around my old coaches and teammates. I work with a few of them and being around them is so nice. They are great friends, and I love hanging out with them. In April, I was offered the chance to become a team coach! Of course I took it, I think you would know how great that opportunity is! I already love it so much, it's so much different than coaching the recreational classes and it feels amazing to be a part of something bigger.
A little while back, for about a year, you were on this kick about I needed to find me a guy. You and my mom would always talk about how much you love "your guys" and how lucky you were to find them. I remember one of the times this topic was brought up you turned to me and said "Where is your guy?" and I said back "I don't have a guy, grandma. I'm not married and I don't have a boyfriend". Then your eyes got really big and you shouted "Well!! You better get on that! I go to the store all the time and I see them everywhere!". You were so set on me finding myself a guy that treats me like grandpa treats you. Well, I found one. He is so amazing, grandma. He makes me the happiest I've ever been in my life. It breaks my heart though, that I finally found my guy and I'm not able to bring him home to you. I think you would approve of him though. Grandpa seems to like him a lot already.
I miss you every single day, grandma. I really do. I'm sorry I get so busy with my life that I can't always make it by to see you as much as I would like to. It definitely doesn't mean I don't think about you and miss you constantly. Every time I look at my wrist and see my forget-me-not flower tattoo that I got for you, I think about you, and know you are with me.
I think you would be proud of me, grandma.
I love you
-Your loving granddaughter, Kira
