I like to tell myself that we all have that one professor who really just doesn't like us. Whether it was in middle school (which was probably well deserved. I hate my middle school self), high school, or now in college, sometimes your personality just doesn't mesh with other people, including professors. And there's not a problem with that. It becomes a problem, though, when your best interests and academic career are cast to the side simply because they don't like you. For me, this occurred my senior year of high school, when I was taking AP Environmental Science. So without further rambling (just kidding, this whole article is a ramble), here is my letter:
Dear Professor,
First off, I would like to say that I don't discredit your ability to teach students. High school is pretty small and word gets around, so I know someone out there found you great. And I was actually pretty excited for your class. I enrolled in AP Enviro after dropping AP Bio because, seriously, that class was way too hard for a second semester senior. And I always was interested in the environment, so I thought this class would be fun and interesting. Well, I think we can both agree I was wrong.
Maybe it was because I was a cocky high school senior. Maybe it was because my personality is one part serious, two parts sarcastic. Maybe you just happened to have a bad day. But my inability to keep my mouth shut and your inability to try and see my logic set us up for a battle that would last a semester. If I find that I was graded unfairly, I will try and raise my grade. And you didn't take too kindly to that. After that, my multiple choice answers (which were graded by a machine) excelled, while the short answers (which you graded) suffered. I couldn't understand how I could do so well on one and be constantly shot down by you on the other. You constantly told me my answers were wrong when I raised my hand, yet would compliment someone who rephrased what I said. But I maintained the attitude that, hey, I have a high B in this class, I know what I'm doing and I would do well on the AP Exam.
Then, a few weeks away from the AP Exam, you told us that if we asked, you would give us an accurate guess of what you believed we would receive on the exam (ranging from 1 to 5). After class, I asked you because, while I did want to know, the cocky side of me wanted to hear you say that I would, at least, get a four on the exam. I vividly remember walking up to you, and hearing those six words come out of your mouth:
"I think you'll get a one."
Are you kidding me?
"I just don't see you succeeding on the exam. I don't see you succeeding in this field at all."
And I know you said it to make me believe you. I know you really wanted me to believe you, so I would stop pushing you about my grades and let them slip because I believed that you were right. Unfortunately for you, you received this reaction:
And this one:
I was determined to prove you wrong. I studied every week leading up to the exam, my motivation being to not only show you that I could do it but to show myself that your opinion was actually irrelevant. So I took the exam and received my high score of a 4, which I always knew I could get. I wrote you a separate email thanking you for always believing in me (two parts sarcasm, remember?). I didn't receive a reply to that email, just a fine of $150 from you for a textbook I never received, which was pretty petty, let me tell you.
But despite all of this, I do thank you from the bottom of my heart. Because without you telling me I couldn't, I would have never known I had the strength to prove you and anyone else wrong. I had always been told I could do whatever I set my mind to, and you were the first (and not the last) to tell me otherwise. But no matter which someone tells me, I know that if I really want it, I'll get it, with or without support. And I want anyone else who's having this happen to them to know that they to can do whatever they want to do and that a professor's opinion does not define your success in that class, career, or your life. So thank you, really.
Sincerely,
Theresa, Environmental Science minor at Towson University