To the very person who tried so hard to bring me down.

Let me tell you, you almost got me—all those comments about my looks, trying to sabotage me behind my back and bringing me down every time I have a dime amount of success. I thought you were my friend and I though this was normal. I took it as constructive criticism and accepted it. I was thankful at times because I thought you really cared.

You may have said these things because they were just so natural to you, but little did you realize how much effect they can have on a person. All the nights I would lay thinking about what you said, convincing myself that it was true. All the times I would stare in front of the mirror for minutes on end criticizing all the ways I could look better. All the times you made me feel like shit and all the times I caught you lying.

To you it was a white lie; to me it was a punch in the face. It was a trigger that made my mind race with all kinds of thoughts. Am I not worthy enough to know the truth? Are we not as close as I thought we were? We were always only on a surface level, never anything deeper and that's what I longed for.

This year, when I found an amazing group of people, I realized what true friendship is: to love one another unconditionally, to be there no matter what and to cheer each other on as we go through the challenges of life.

You got me...but not all the way. Because I'm a coward, I can't find the courage to cut you out of my life but let me tell you one thing: you have lost my trust, and to you that may seem like nothing. But that's something you can never get back from me. I will never give you my trust again and it may not matter now, but it's going to hit you. Whether it's now or many years later, when I'm not there when you need me the most, I hope you realize what you lost.