I don't think we will ever understand why you had to go so soon. Only God knows the answer to that question, and there are some things that we just aren't meant to understand no matter how difficult it may be to accept. We just have to hold on to the memories that we have and thank God for allowing those people in our life for the time He did.
Not a day goes by that I don't miss you. We all do. So much.
They say time heals all wounds, and for some things that may be true but for circumstances like this, you just have to find a way to face the pain. It never goes away, it just becomes bearable.
Knowing you were exactly the age I am now when you left us, is just almost impossible to think about. You had your whole life ahead of you.
Thinking about how you have missed graduations, weddings, all the Thanksgivings, Christmas's, and birthdays. New nieces and nephews that I know would have looked up to you just as much as I did.
I often wonder what kind of person you would be if you were still with us. If you would have your own little family by now. What you would have done with your life. How many times you would want to smack me because of the decisions I was making. Or if you would be there right along with me telling me to go ahead and do it.
So many times I wish I could just talk to you. Ask for your advice, just tell you about my day, or have one of our little fights just one more time. Now that I'm old enough to appreciate those things.
Despite missing you terribly, I wouldn't have you back in this old world for anything. Your soul was just absolutely way too sweet for it. I have to say though I am glad that you were not here for all the heartbreaks, failures, and disappointments.
I do wish I could tell you how much you're missed though. How big of an impact you left on so many different people down here on this earth. Even after all this time when your name is brought up, it makes the whole room light up and even if there's tears involved there are still smiles on everyone's face.
I would absolutely love to think that you were up there sitting by Jesus, watching over us, but I don't believe you are. If you could look down here, it would just cause you pain and heartache and I wouldn't want that for you. Besides, there's no pain in Heaven.
I try my best to live a life that I know you would be proud of. I believe you would be more than proud to see how all of us have grown up to be. I am looking forward to the day that I do get to be with you again though! It has been entirely too long since I have seen that sweet smile of yours. Forever holding on tight to all our memories, until we meet again.
I love you sweet angel!