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To The One Who Caught Me When I Fell

I've fallen for other guys who had promised me the world, but only did so to have some sort of control, or say over my life

Lizzie Stiadle

Nov 06, 2017

The Narrative Club

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If my appearance is at all influenced by the way I feel, I must have been glowing for the past few weeks. I declared myself "too jaded" after too many relationships of bad intentions masked in pretty words. I was shaken when I realized how insincerity can sound hauntingly similar to congeniality; so I began to wonder if genuinely kind people still existed.

I've fallen for other guys who had promised me the world, but only did so to have some sort of control, or say over my life. I'm not into the conventional idea of charm, or chivalry because it seems so insincere. However, something about being around you felt real.

It might surprise you to know that I fell hardest when you told me I was free to leave, to walk away whenever. Those words made me feel safer than any "I love you" I had ever heard.

I am attracted to your patience: You let me live my life and don't become jealous of what I am passionate about. You don't get upset when I become so enveloped in doing what I love, that I forget to respond to your message. You're embracing the parts of me that I thought made me "undateable".

I am intrigued by your life away from me and I always want you to pursue what's best for you. I don't want you to give anything up for me--I just want to give you the amount of support you have given me so far.

I would be lying if I said that I wasn't scared-- but for the same reasons that I am scared-- I am happy. I will no longer let fear guide me away from this quintessential feeling of contentment you have helped me to find again.

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To The One Who Caught Me When I Fell

I've fallen for other guys who had promised me the world, but only did so to have some sort of control, or say over my life

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The struggles of having an RBF are all too real

1. People asking if you're mad at them.

2. Those people who hand out flyers don't always try to stop you.

3. Creepy guys telling you to smile.

4. "I thought you were a bitch when I first met you."

5. People telling you you'd be "so much prettier if you smiled."

6. Doing your makeup and looking great, which somehow intensifies the bitch face.

7. Regularly explaining "it's just my face."

We all go through certain stages when we have a crush, Tina just explains it better.

That moment that someone you never looked twice at suddenly makes you do a double take out of no where.

But you can't have a crush, that's outrageous. It's all in your head.

Because you don't have a crush, there's no reason to tell anyone about anything. Right?

But then they do something irresistible and you start to lose it.

Now accepting the fact you have a crush, you have to keep it under control.

Then there's the part where you tell your friends who will claim they called it.

They'll be excited and cheer you on. That's until they realize that your crush is all you'll be talking about.

Your obsession has become so bad, that your Facebook stalking is getting out of control.

But your friends will try and help move things along any way they can. That doesn't mean it will be any helpful though.

As time goes on, you start having fantasies about the two of you and it's starting to scare you a little.

You can't focus on anything because all your attention is on them and everything they do.

Anybody who comes near your crush is now an enemy, and you are willing to fight for your crush.

When you see them, you act like an idiot. Trying to hide your feelings may not be as discrete as you think.

Keeping your feelings inside will start to be harder and harder until you can't keep it inside anymore.

Who knows, maybe it will work out? Take a chance.

Everybody hurts sometimes.

May the odds be ever in your favor.

What about those of us who don't do it all in four years?

1. You feel like an elder.

2. You may feel lonely.

3. Senioritis is more real than ever.

4. You may feel a little down sometimes.

5. Fear of missing out won't be as real.

6. You are a college pro.

7. You'll have more free time.

8. You're happy you're still in school.

9. You feel like a guru.

10. You continue to grow.

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