To The Man Who Didn't Want To Take 'No' For An Answer | The Odyssey Online
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Politics and Activism

To The Man Who Didn't Want To Take 'No' For An Answer

How dare you?

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To The Man Who Didn't Want To Take 'No' For An Answer
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To the man who didn't want to take 'no' for an answer,

How dare you?

How dare you butt your ugly head into my life, into my business, and make me feel so uncomfortable? How dare you make me feel so powerless, so afraid, so...hunted?

Before you get your briefs in a bunch, let me explain. It was okay of you to approach me, and to start a conversation. This is a normal part of life, and an innocent enough act when executed appropriately. However, once I politely declined your request for coffee, or dinner, or whatever you had in mind, that should have been the end of the interaction.

Once you feel the need to drop lines such as "men my age know how to treat women your age right," or "I'm going to give you my number anyway in case you change your mind," you have gone too far.

No means no.

I am a human being. I am strong, I am thoughtful, I am smart, and I am more than capable of making my own decisions. I am terribly sorry if my decisions (which are mine to make) harm your precious ego, but I make the choices best for me, and that is that.

Why?

Why is it that in our society, men are the predator and women are the victim? Why is it that a woman cannot turn a man down without fearing for her safety? Why is it okay for you to come into my business and keep pushing, making me feel so uncomfortable and so unsafe that I feel the need to call a friend?

And lastly: to the girl who can relate all too well,

I'm sorry. I'm sorry you know what I've gone through, because you've gone through it yourself. It is our unfortunate reality that many women can relate. I'm sorry that our society has failed you, and that you have to fear for your safety so often. I'm sorry that our children, our daughters in particular, are going to be growing up in the same reality. I'm sorry that this is what things have come to. And I'm sorry that I have no solutions, and nothing left to say.

I am appalled, I am hurt, I am enraged, and I am sad.

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