For many women there are men in theirs lives that prepare them for the man they will marry. Sometimes all these attributes happen with one man and sometimes with different ones. Either way, what we can learn for them can change our lives.
To my first love:
Thank you for teaching me to love myself first. You always told me I was perfect and beautiful. Even if we hadn't spoken in months, you would still leave me a message to reassure me, and to tell me to never let any one convince me otherwise. You always taught me to never give up on myself. You were the first boy to tell me he loved me after knowing my quirks, weirdness, and flaws. You made me realize that someone can love me for who I am as a whole and not just bits and pieces of me. You always tried telling me you weren't good enough for me but you were. You always tried to help me but never let me help you. You taught me no matter what happens or how mad we are at each other, you should never stop being there for your partner. We barely talk anymore but knowing I can still count on you 15 years later still means the world to me. You will forever be my twin and the boy who taught me I was perfect just the way I was.
To the one I thought I'd marry:
Thank you for being everything I thought I wanted; for being so perfect it hurt. Thank you for teaching me all the things you did. Such as fighting is apart of a healthy relationship and that even though you hated fighting we should have fought for the things we wanted. Sometimes people are better with imperfections. You were perfect, flawless and nothing I could ever compare to; I felt like I held you back from everything you wanted to accomplish and who you wanted to be. You taught me intelligence should never be used against each other in a fight. Distance takes the utmost trust and confidence while still being tremendously straining and heartbreaking. I could probably never do it again, but I'm glad we tried to make it work as long as we did. Being your partners best friend is one of the most important things you can be. But planning every aspect of your life is scarier then it seems, and sometimes while doing so you realize the white picket fence isn't what you wanted. To love someone with your heart so fully even if you know they might not love you the same amount. I am forever sorry for not realizing how much you loved me and all my imperfections. I'm sorry for pushing you away and causing you pain when all you did was try to save me. You never stopped proving how much I meant to you and how much you cared. Thank you for loving me through the worst times.
You both taught me that every relationship gives you something no matter how hard it was. Even as the years go bye, we can always still be there for each other. Sometimes you love someone more then they love you but loving someone doesn't make them obligated to stay around.You can't choose for someone else and you can't always save someone who doesn't want to be saved. People are perfect in their imperfections; you don't have to change who you are to be loved. Most importantly never let someone forget how much they are loved just the way they are.
Thank you both for helping me realize that I am a wonderful, crazy girl who is uncertain about many things, besides one; the man who I plan to marry. He is imperfect and we fight alot; we actually bicker like an old married couple most say. He is my best friend and my shelter, he is there for me even on my worse days. He takes care of me and the multiple health problems that are always occurring. He is patient and loving and my greatest gift from God. I am fully comfortable on all accounts about everything with him. We have our rough days, but we continue to love each other because we know better days are to come. I put my whole heart into our relationship and hold nothing back because two boys once taught me some very valuable lessons. Two of the most important ones are if you truly love someone don't let them go and never stop proving to someone how much you love them.