We’ve all been in what we thought was love. We’ve fallen hard for the wrong person and have had our hearts broken. We’ve all had to say goodbye to people we thought we could never live without, and we’ve had to tell ourselves to “get over it." It's never easy to just “forget about it” and move on, but eventually, we travel past the relationship and continue our lives. After reading another one of those “letter to the boy that broke my heart” articles, I started to doubt the female population.

I know so many girls that talk about their ex-boyfriends as if they are the worst humans in the world. Ex-boyfriends from several years back are still a source of hate in their lives. I have got to say that I simply cannot relate to the way they speak so lowly of their exes.

Now, I know that some guys do some awful things to the girls they date. I'm in no way saying that's okay. But I am saying that holding these things against these people for excessive amounts of time is not acceptable either.

Look at it like this. A boy cheated on you two years ago. You found out, and it broke your heart. It hurt. You were sad, but time healed those wounds and you moved on. Now, what if that never happened? What if you were still in that relationship? Would your life be the same? Because I know mine wouldn’t.

I have never hated anyone I have dated in the past. Those relationships may have not ended on a good note, and I may have blamed the other person for awhile, but in time, I forgave them. And, maybe I have never told them, but I appreciate what every boy I have dated offered me. I learned so much from any relationship I have ever been in, and that is definitely not something I could ever hate someone for.

Relationships end for many reasons, but the fact of the matter is that when a relationship comes to a halt, it's ultimately for the better. When one door closes, another is bound to open. The relationships we had in our past were probably dysfunctional and doomed from the beginning. Even if we didn’t realize it at the time, looking back, we realize just how unhealthy those relationships were.

If your heart was never broken by someone in your past, you would never have had a chance to heal. You would never have had the chance to move on and eventually meet the person you are truly meant to be with. Maybe you have met that person, and maybe you haven’t. If you haven't, the only thing to do is have faith that it will happen when the time is right.

Sure, when a relationship ends, your going to cope by saying awful things about the other person. You might even claim to hate them, but that's only because you thought you were in love with them when you really weren’t. Saying you hate someone is easier than saying you were wrong in loving them. It makes the pain less heavy on your heart to put the other person down, but only for a while. When you hold on to that hatred for a long period of time, it will hurt you more than it will hurt the other person.

So, to the girls that hold on to the pain of the past, let me give you some advice. After feelings are gone, and all is said and done, do yourself a favor and forgive the other person. After all, isn’t that what Jesus would want us to do? The fact of the matter is, holding onto resentment serves no purpose, other than making you a bitter person in the long run. When you offer forgiveness, it takes a load off of your heart that you may not have even known was there. “Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive and you will be forgiven.” (Luke 6:37)