A few days ago, I came across an Odyssey article titled "I'm The Girl Who's Never Been In Love and that's OK". The title alone instantly resonated with me. Similar to the author, Victoria Thalassinos, I have never been in love. I've dated boys and certainly felt romantic feelings towards them, but I've never actually been in love, nor have I been in a long term relationship. After reading and sharing the article, I was inspired to write a response to Victoria, who had summed up my feelings towards love and relationships perfectly.
First of all, I wanted to say thank you to Victoria for giving me such content to work with and for inspiring me to the point where I write my own response article to a fellow Odyssey writer. She had put my exact feelings about my personal expectations, thoughts, and feelings about love, relationships, and everything in between into words. Growing up, I thought I would have met my soulmate already. I thought I would fall madly in love with a boy I met in high school or college. I had visions of being that adorable couple who constantly showered each other with love and affection, including in public for all of our friends and family to see. I had hopes that I would find someone who loved me unconditionally, who was my rock and my number one support system for all of life's challenges and hardships. And I expected all of this by college and as I stated before, it just hasn't happened for me - and that's okay.
When you're single, it sometimes feels as if everyone around you is in a relationship. As an Odyssey writer, I will constantly see articles about loving your significant other and will not be able to relate to it at all. I will see my friends and family members talk about their boyfriends and girlfriends and how they adore them to the moon and back, how they make them happier than anyone else could. Although I am extremely happy for them and wish them the best of luck, I can't help but feel jealous a lot of the times. They have someone who loves and adores them to bits and pieces. They have someone who always prioritizes them and will take them on fancy, thoughtful dates. They have someone they're completely head over heels, in love with. I won't lie, I do want that. I'm a human being who has a basic need for love and affection. However, just because I don't have a boyfriend right now doesn't mean I'll never fall in love; I just have to be patient.
More importantly, however, it doesn't mean that I am unworthy of love or a bad person just because I'm not in a relationship at the moment. While I don't have a boyfriend, I have plenty of things in my life to be eternally grateful for - my family, my friends, my education, my hobbies, my opportunities, my dog, my shelter, my health... and myself. I have struggled to love myself and feel comfortable in my own skin for as long as I can remember. It is something I work at every single day. The last sentence of this article really struck me: "I am clumsy, I am gullible, and I am loud, but I am beautiful, I am kind, and I may be the girl who has never been in love, but I will not be the girl who forgets to love herself." I have my weaknesses and I have my strengths. I may have never been in love, but I can love myself because at the end of the day, I am the one person who is always going to be there for me.
Thank you, Victoria, for your inspiring and incredibly relatable words. Keep on rocking, girl; you're doing great.
Sincerely,
Another girl who has never been in love and is okay with that