Mama and Daddy did an outstanding job creating a little heart-breaker. From as early as I can remember, I was taught to NEVER feel like I have to depend on anyone else. I was told that in this big, beautiful world - I need to take care of me first. You never know who is temporary or who is staying, so never fall fully dependent on those you're not sure on.
My parents of course were a different story as I was 100% dependent on them. Every day I depended on them to put me in clothes that match, to feed me, and make sure I'm wearing a fresh pull-up, so on and so-forth. But who isn't dependent on their parents? That's not what this article is about. It's about being independent to everyone else that you meet throughout your life. To the people passing by that like to hang around where you're at for a while. Always be dependent on yourself; No one else.
Being raised this way, in middle school I was never afraid to speak my mind. If I saw another boy or girl picking on someone, I was not afraid to step in and tell them to stop. Why? I was raised that way. To never let my fear stop me from doing something I believe in. Be who you are and have no fear of others - you are you.
As I grew older, you could barely ever catch me with a "boyfriend". Why? I've been raised to be very independent and I didn't ever need a boyfriend. I never wanted one because I just thought they would get in the way of doing the things I wanted. I didn't have time for a boyfriend, I had other things to do to further myself. After all, that's who I knew I had for sure.
At age 16, I started working and got my first job. I was ecstatic! I was old enough to make my own money, I could stop asking my parents for money (they would gladly give it, that wasn't the problem - I didn't want to), I could start spoiling myself and saving for my future. I could now express my independence by driving myself to work, and earning my own money. And boy, did that feel good.
Throughout high school, I had many friends and made so many memories. Although I had many friends, I only had a select few of best friends. The difference being: friends I stop and talk to in the hallway; best friends I hang out with outside of school. I never liked being in too big of a group of people, because I always felt like I needed to be in a smaller group to communicate better and to have a better time.
Now that I'm nearing my 20's and am in college - all of those things have remained the same except a couple. I now have a boyfriend of over a year. And if you would have told me that a year and a half ago I would not have believed you. I now look forward to marriage and starting a family - but that has not affected my independence and values. I still work towards bettering myself for the future every day. I work 30+ hours a week and am a full-time student. Why? Because part of me still wonders "what if". What if something happens in the future and I am left alone. I need to be able to put food on the table for my (unborn) children, and keep a roof over their heads. I need to make sure that I'm working towards that now, just in case it happens then.
Ladies, remember!
Here's a couple of things my mom told me when I was little:
"You'll never need a boy more than you need your daddy"
"Anything a man can give you, you can give yourself"
IT'S OKAY TO BE INDEPENDENT LADIES! WORK IT