To the Girl Who Feels "Talked About" | The Odyssey Online
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To the Girl Who Feels "Talked About"

Remembering who your FRIENDS are, and not the ones just on Facebook.

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To the Girl Who Feels "Talked About"

Raise your hand if you have ever felt personally victimized by... everyone.

I've laid in my bathtub rereading one subtweet about myself and watched the likes and retweets climb for hours while balling my eyes out. How did people I'd never even met have such an awful and false opinion of me? Why was I the person to get targeted after I hadn't done anything wrong? The dictionary defines gossip as "casual or unconstrained conversation or reports about other people, typically involving details that are not confirmed as being true." And, It's typically just that, untrue. I chose to believe it, but why? Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Vsco, Snapchat.. (I could go on) have unleashed the demons in us all and destroyed what was formally known as a friendship. It has loosely thrown around the word "friend" all while making us feel like we are empty and all alone. What we need to remember, is while they may be our friend on social media, that doesn't mean they are in the real world. Social Media has opened up a door of hate in our world. It has given opportunity to everyone to just be, for lack of better words, mean. I WISH I could count the hurtful things that have been said about me, sometimes by people who don't even know me. It does not matter what good or bad things have happened in my life, someone has something to say about it.

Social Media has completely dictated every aspect of our lives. Why does it mean that one person is more invested in a relationship based off who is more open online about their significant other? Why on Mother's Day does society require you to post a novel on how much you love your mom, rather than actually spending the day with her and saying it to her face? Why if we post one picture out with friends does it mean we do nothing but party? Why are we almost required to share every intimate detail about our lives with the whole world? The truth is, we're absolutely not. We don't owe anyone anything. It makes the moments in your life less special because it's shared with all. Even worse, it gives people the idea that they do know you and everything about you when they really don't. Which in turn, gives them the "right" to talk about you. In case you've forgotten, the difference between a relationship online and face to face, is that people choose very carefully what is shared, whether it is good or bad. They have the power and the curse to make themselves into something they are not, just as I and everyone else is guilty of.

I'll be honest, social media has in fact made me feel good about myself once or twice, each like makes me feel just a little bit prettier and a little more loved. However, it's also illustrated my life into something that it's not. If you scrolled through my instagram, I bet you wouldn't believe me that I maybe only fix my hair and wear makeup once a week. So why don't I post that? It's because each photo or status I post, I very carefully determine and generate which will get me the least negative remarks. The first thing that comes to my mind isn't all the likes I'm going to get, no, it's how many times will this be screenshotted and thrown into a group chat to be made fun of, or who will have a nasty comment to make to my face or maybe to someone else's. It's because I do care about what people think, as much as I wish I didn't. While you may think this is because of my anxiety, or because I'm insecure, it's actually because these things have all happened to me, to everyone. We're all victims.. and we're all villains. It's time as individuals that we stop believing everything online as the truth, and the whole truth.

Why does my name seem to be one that is easy off their lips? My mom might say it is because they're jealous. Really, I have no good reason why I am a hot topic of discussion other than I have allowed people into my life by sharing more than they need to know online. So what's my verdict? Don't let it get to you. If you are going to continue to share your life with everyone, actually focus on the positive. Remember all the people who commented on your post telling you congratulations, or I'm sorry for your loss, or you look beautiful.. and BELIEVE THEM! Don't let the one negative comment outweigh the thousand good ones. Or, even consider unplugging for awhile, cut it off right at the source. Focus on loving yourself, and truly loving those around you. In the end, you do you, baby girl: because it's not anyone's damn business if you don't let it be.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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