We've all heard the stories of guys who do us girls wrong or don't treat us right. We've heard of girls being rebounds, or girls dealing with guys who aren't over their ex. But what about the guys who go through this or deal with this in a female? What about the guys who have had to attempt to break down the walls we females have built over our hearts, or the wounds that are still too fresh? Recently I realized there had been a guy in my life who truly didn't deserve me.
So, here's to you... To the boy who didn't deserve me, I am so deeply sorry.
As soon as we started talking you swept me off my feet. You were so kind, so caring, so giving.. in every way you were perfect. You made me laugh, you made me happy, and you made life easy. Everyone liked you. My friends supported us, my family loved you (they still do lol). But soon into this fairytale, I realized something horrible, you were no longer my idea of perfect. I knew you were perfect, but I knew you didn't deserve me, so I made up in my head that you weren't my idea of perfect anymore.
I knew you needed someone who was going to be just as perfect as you were to them, and I knew it wasn't me.
I wasn't ready for you, honestly, I'm still not sure I'm ready. I realized soon that fears of the past were still there. To me, it was easier to let you go than to let you in, or to take the chance of things being different this time. It wasn't until later that I realized how easy it would have been to just let you have my heart. To let you in the stone-cold wall I have built. I'm sorry I couldn't return to you all that you deserved — it is one of my biggest regrets.
I hope you know how much you taught me. You taught me, regardless of life's past circumstances, to always start fresh... Always give someone new a fighting chance from the start. You taught me its OK to let someone have your heart and to take a chance on falling in love. Unfortunately, I didn't learn these things until it was too late. The time we spent together is a time I will cherish forever, and a time I am now grateful for.
Thank you for showing me what it's like to have someone always by my side, and to have someone who is always supportive. I'm sorry that things didn't work out in our favor, but I know now that maybe it was for a reason. I will forever be thankful for you. You will always be perfect in my eyes, and I hope to see you find the perfect person for you because you will deserve her and not me.
I hope your next girlfriend is everything I couldn't be. I hope she returns to you all the love and kindness that you give, I hope I didn't change your heart because it was a heart of gold.
You didn't deserve me, but I hope you deserve her.
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