Dear Boy,

You drive me crazy.

Absolutely clinically insane!

I pride myself on being calm and collected when the world spins out of control and everyone else is struggling to regain their balance.

While my peers struggle with finding their place in this world, I have always felt safe and confident in knowing what I want in life and where I want to be (as much as one can at 20 years old, anyways).

Yet, the moment you stepped into my life, with your stupid grin that lights up your entire face and makes your eyes sparkle, the ground was pulled out from underneath my feet and suddenly I'm not so sure anymore.

One part of me wants to stride across the room, offer my hand to you and say, "Hi."

The other part of me wants to shut myself away to prevent the inevitable babbling that would occur as soon as those words left my mouth.

My mind is in this constant struggle of "Do I, Don't I", and it's exhausting.

When I finally worked up the nerve to talk to you (read my friend bullied me into texting you) my words failed me.

Me! A self-proclaimed storyteller who has written pages upon pages filled to the brim with plot and dialogue, yet I cannot find the words to describe how very much I would like to see you again.

Do you see what you do to me?

Do you hear my heart thudding in my chest the moment you walk into the room and your eyes meet mine?

Did you hear the sharp intake of breath the moment I saw you?

Do you see my cheeks burn red every time I manage to string a few words together?

God help me, do you see me at all?

Because if you do not let me know now, so I can wrap my heart before the damage is too far gone.

I will not blame you.

Sincerely,

The Bumbling Writer