To the Best Friend I Always Needed,

If someone would have told me three years ago that you and I would be as close as we are today, I probably would have laughed in their face. When I walked into our church as a junior in college, I had no intentions of staying there for a long period of time.

I worked with you for the whole year when a turn of events caused you to step up as our Youth Pastor. I needed an internship; you needed help, and that’s where it all began. I was quiet (looking back now, that’s extremely hard to believe). I still didn’t know who I was or how God wanted to use me. I was terrified of what people thought about me. I was still very young with a lot of growing and soul-searching to do.

Despite the walls I had unknowingly put up around me, you slowly but surely forced your way into my life. I will always remember Costco runs with you, and you would ask me some of the most random questions. Honestly, why did you even care what my dream car was?

Our friendship blossomed just in time for my college graduation. I was now faced with many unknowns and decisions, which made for a rough transition. I can remember crying on the couch in our office because I had no idea where I was going to live after graduation. You were simply there to comfort me and remind me of God’s plan and promises. I didn’t realize until later on how much that meant to me.

Then came August. I watched from the outside as your life became difficult. In the moment, I had no idea what was happening, but all I knew was that I wanted and needed to be there for you in whatever way you would allow.

It wasn’t until months later that you finally opened up about what was going on, but I was so glad you did. Even if all I did was take some extra tasks off your hands to lighten your load, I was okay with that. While it was hard to watch in the moment, I’m glad I got to see you gain victory in your struggle.

Fast forward to the past few months: I feel like a mess. I am burned out and have lost the spark inside that makes me who I am.

At times, when my hope is depleted and I lose sight of my passions and goals, I realize that I need someone to come alongside and push me. I need reminders of who I am and why I am important. I need someone to be patient with my chaos until I find peace and order again. I need someone like you, and I think God knows that too.

You have truly gone above and beyond to be there for me and no words will ever express my gratitude. I guess to put it simply, I'm thankful that God has turned those awkward car rides into Meghan Trainor dance parties. Maybe now we can work on my dance moves, because we both know I need all the help I can get.