Hello, little country, little nation

You seem alone, rather scared

Why don't you come with me

There is much prosperity to be shared

Oh no, don't be upset, don't turn away

I have a solution

Let's foment

A little revolution

That's better, my new friend

Now, let me in

I have lots of foreign aid to lend

I will build your schools, elevate your people

Have some western cars and grain at a discount

I'll even share my fashion, too

See friend, together there's nothing we can't surmount

Watch as your people smile

As skyscrapers rise over the jungle, or the desert, or mountains

Or wherever it is you live

On the day of parade

When squares of soldiers march through downtown

As your flag waves from every available surface

My flag will be there, too

As your ministers set the budget

A group of men clouded by cigar smoke and numbers

My minister will be there, too

Reminding you not to fudge it

Your country is young, unbroken, undeveloped

And an abundance of a particular resource

Black, shining, bubbling in metal barrels

I require all of this, of course

With you, and others

I string out a chain

That I may be protected from nuclear pain

So, your soldiers must equip

With my latest guns, planes, and ships

Stay safe, and don’t go rogue

If that’s the case... rip.