You are more than my sister.
You are my warden, protector, second mom, advice-giver, the hand that wipes my tears, my nightmare-chaser, hype team, role model, inspiration, and my best friend.
You always say that you've watched me grow up and are so proud of me. But I am so incredibly proud of you. I've watched you struggle with your head held high and fire in your eyes. I've watched your heart shatter right in front of my eyes and while I felt helpless, you picked yourself up and kept going. I've seen tears fall from your eyes and heard you tell me not to cry because I'm bigger than that. You care so much for everyone but you are afraid to let others care for you.
Once, we talked about my fear of ever being a mom and you turned to me and said, "I knew I was going to be a good mom when I was still an aunt. I knew that if I had the ability to love a human being that wasn't my own with all of my heart, that I would love my child ten times more than that." I think about that every day.
I look at your children and feel my heart swell when they smile. I want to cry when they laugh because I know that they will only be this young for a little while longer and then they grow to become just like us. I want to cry because I know that this is the brightest their smiles will ever be because I know what we've been through and I know what growing up looks like.
But then I want to cry because I see the bond they have as sisters and know that they will be ok because not only do they have us, but they have their sister too. So I know they are going to be just fine.
But you underestimate yourself. You always tell me, "Babygirl, you've been through hell." WOMAN! You've been through hell and back so many times, I can no longer count the scars on your heart and body.
You are my motivation to stay strong because I see how resilient you are. You are the reason I work so hard every day because I want to help give you a better life. I want to help you give those sweet baby girls a better life. But you always say "If I didn't do..." or "If only I could..."
You have the power to change your circumstances every day. I don't want to ever see you give up. I know you can be so much more than what you think you can be. You always tell me that I'm going to do big things, but you don't see in yourself that you can do the same.
It's ok, though, I will show you how. You've taught me so many lessons in life. you have helped me keep my head up. I'm going to do the same. It's time. You remind me every day that I'm not alone. That I'm beautiful. That I'm strong. I don't tell you every day but, you are beautiful. you are strong. You have power. You can do big things.
We are made of steel and blood. You are not alone. You have me.