Dear Mom and Dad,
Don’t get me wrong, I couldn’t be happier to be home for the summer! Yes, I’m going to miss all my friends but I’m even more excited for the family dinners, movie nights, and catching up with all my old friends and family. But, please try to remember, I’ve been off, basically living on my own (or more so just surviving) at college since September. I could do whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted. That's in pretty harsh contrast to having rules at home. So to help make our adjustment period easier, I’ve put together a list of possible compromises.
1. Curfew
Back in high school, you guys held tight to that 11 or 12 o’clock curfew, and I understand that. You hate going to bed knowing I’m not home, so you try to stay awake. It makes sense; you just want to make sure I’m safe. I get that. But what you need to understand is where I’m coming from. Since September, I could come and go as I pleased. Its one am? Sure, sounds like a great time for a trip to McDonalds. Sometimes I’d stay out all night, and no one would mind. See where we might butt-heads on this one?
Compromise: No curfew. Hear me out on this one... I will let you know my general timeline and game plan (sometimes I'm even a bit unclear on that so I’ll do my best). I won't come home at ridiculous hours all the time and I won't stay out all night without you knowing beforehand. Communication is key on this one.
2. Going out
Speaking of communication, back in the day, we always had an understanding of asking permission before I did something. It was always “Can I go to Katie's?” and never “I’m going to Katie's.” But again, I’m now (technically) an adult and have been making decisions for myself for awhile now. At school, I didn't have to ask anyone's permission before I went anywhere, so you can imagine that transition back would be difficult for me.
Compromise: Don’t get angry with me if you find that I don’t immediately consult you before making plans. I will, of course, ask and talk to you about major things like overnight trips or road trips with my friends. But if I’m just hanging out with some friends for the day and heading to the movies that night, chances are I’m just going to go. But I will make sure to text or call you, to update you on my doings.
3. Unpacking
Okay, this is a sore spot, especially with Dad: I don’t want to unpack. To be honest, I just packed all of that up and it was the longest and most hideous task. The last thing I want to do is unpack it and find a new place for it all till next semester... (when I’ll just have to pack it all again). I’m perfectly content living out of boxes and bags. But I understand your frustration with all my stuff being everywhere and taking up room in the garage and dining room.
Compromise: I will unpack. I’ll give you this one, I’ll get the boxes out of the garage and I’ll put everything away. It's going to take some time though and there will be some serious complaining, but it’ll get done.
4. Eating
Since September, I’ve been stuffing my face at what seemed like an endless buffet of food, every meal. We would sit for hours at the dining hall, only getting up to go get our third, fourth, or to be honest, our seventh round of dinner. I eat like crazy. I eat when I’m hungry, I eat when I’m full, I eat when I’m bored, happy, sad, tired... you name it and I can make into a reason to eat. For the past nine or so months you’ve only been shopping and cooking for two, me being back is a bit of culture shock. A hit to the wallet at the grocery store.
Compromise: I will try to scale back the 11 meals a day if you promise to buy more snacks. Popcorn is a gift from God and if we have mac and cheese in the house, all will be fine.
5. Family time
This one is tricky. Believe me, I really do want to spend time with you guys and have movie nights or take day trips, or whatever it is you want to do. I really do. Its just, yes I’ve only seen you a handful amount of times over this year, but I’ve seen most of my friends less than that. Balancing seeing them, working, and hanging out with you guys can be difficult and sometimes (most of the time) I feel like you get the short end of the stick.
Compromise: While I can’t promise I will be able to spend quality time with you all the time, I can promise I will get in a lot of family time. I can also apologize in advance for the things I’m bound to miss while I run around, trying to catch up with everyone. Give it some time. Once the dust settles, I’ll have plenty of time for family activities. So if you agree to be patient, I agree to make sure I make time for whats really important.
There will always be other things we fight and bicker over as I make the transition back to living at home, but I know we’ll easily work through them and can make this a great summer. I’m looking forward to all the adventures that these next few months holds and sharing those memories with you guys. I’m glad to be back. There's no place like home.
Love, your returning college student
