Meredith Grey, you are who I strive to be.

No not the part about being a surgeon. Not the wonderfully gorgeous McDreamy. Not the high tequila tolerance. Those things are all things I do love about the character that I have spent my Thursday nights adoring season after season, but there is something more about her that I hope for in my own life.

I want her strength. She has grown so much over the decade plus that I have watched her deal with tragedy, pain, joy, and ridiculous plotlines galore. I want her ability to turn from dark and twisty to a woman of strength and power.

As time has gone on in my own life, I have begun to relate more and more to the Meredith Grey met in season 1. This woman who is searching for purpose; who is struggling with her identity. A woman who fills her life with alcohol and inappropriate men. Someone that a ton of college woman on the brink of graduation can relate to.

The evolution of Dr. Grey gives me hope for one of my own. As time goes on, I hope for my life to transform in the likeness of Meredith. She shows that there can be a light at the end of the tunnel. As I face struggles, not the level of plane crashes and everyone around me dropping like flies, I find having that aspiration helps me get through the rougher times.

Meredith Grey you are an inspiration even though you are fictitious. I will end my monologue of sorts with part of a Dr. Grey one:

“Change. We don't like it. We fear it, but we can't stop it from coming. We either adapt to change or we get left behind. It hurts to grow, anybody who tells you it doesn't is lying, but here's the truth sometimes the more things change the more they stay the same. And sometimes, oh, sometimes change is good. Sometimes change is everything.”