To Nazareth Farm, my home in the mountains.

Quick overview: Nazareth Farm is an intentional Catholic community in Doddridge County, West Virginia, that provides home repair to the surrounding communities, with the help of volunteers that come for retreats, whether they be high schoolers, college-aged students or adults. Those at the Farm live by the four cornerstones of prayer, community, simplicity and service, and incorporate those into everything they do. The Farm is run by the Staff, a group of people who sign on to live in community at the Farm for at least one year. They are helped by “part-time staff,” or simply volunteers who stay anywhere from four weeks to four months, known as the Sojourners, or “Sojos.”

I remember stepping off the bus as a scared high schooler, completely unaware of how my life was going to change in the coming days. I remember the hugs and shouts of “Welcome home!” that seemed so weird and so unfitting, because this place wasn’t my home! I was just here for a week doing some community service!

I remember that second night, after we had spent the whole day doing chores in the humid June heat. I was in the garden, planting or weeding, I can’t remember. We had a short reprieve for lunch, and then we were on to the hike. I hated that dang hike. I got way in over my head on it, and pushed myself beyond what I was able. I was overheated and dizzy. I didn’t think I could make it to the top. But with the support of Paul (bless him) and my teacher Matt, I did it, and though I felt proud, I was tired, I was sweaty and I wanted to go home. I felt so overwhelmed.

The one redeeming part of that day was meeting my work crew, but even that I was worried about, because none of the seven other people were from my school. I remember writing in my journal that night, “Only six more days until I’m home :)” that’s how much I was not feeling the experience.

The next morning arrived and we did chores. I was probably in the garden again I can’t remember, but then something else happened. We went to our first worksite as a crew, roofing at Barb’s house, and everything clicked. We sang “Livin’ on Prayer,” “Bohemian Rhapsody” and dozens of other things with Danny and T-Kupp as we scraped the shingles off of her roof. We laughed, we joked and we had some pretty deep conversations, considering we were still having trouble remembering everyone’s name.

On the car ride home, we came up with our crew name, or, well, Kyle did, and that was “Squaaaaad” with five A’s. I remember that was pretty important to us. That night I still had the countdown in my journal, but there was a different emotion behind it. The days passed pretty similarly: chores, worksites, home, sleep, repeat. Each day a new worksite, each day a new experience that brought me closer to my crew, my high school classmates, the other volunteers, and the staff and Sojos that were leading us.

By the end of the week, I wondered how I could ever leave this place. I wondered how I could leave my home, and how those utterances of “Welcome home!” were so much more poignant and so much more real. I wondered how I would leave my Squaaaaad, the people I had come to see as a family, and how I would miss my car rides to and from the worksites with my group chaperone Jack and fellow high school volunteers, Kyle and Nate.

I wondered why God had brought me here and all these wonderful staff, Sojos and volunteers into my life for just seven days. Why He gave me an experience so wonderful, so indescribable, only to have it over in a blink of an eye. I remember that long, 20-plus hour bus ride back to Texas, catching the eyes of my classmates and knowing that they were feeling the same way. That we were all leaving a part of ourselves up on the mountain.

The Farm couldn’t get rid of me that easily, though, and the minute I could, I applied to be a Sojourner for four weeks this summer and was accepted. A week before I left, I was terrified again. It had been so long, what if I had built up this place and this experience? What if it wasn’t the magical place I remembered? What if it was too much? My first week was hard. It was hard for me to let go of the comforts of home and of the modern world (no phones, limited internet, three showers a week, bunkbeds) and to fully immerse myself in the experience.

That week was a college group week, and man, let me tell you, those volunteers changed my life more than I changed theirs. From the inside jokes we all had (Happy birthday, James), to the singing of “Hamilton” everywhere and anywhere, to the conversations that came from Knell’s lunch questions, you guys challenged me to open up and step out of my shell in ways that I hadn’t before, and accepted me for who I was. The kindness and support you all provided me that week was incredible, and I thank all of you for it.

The last three weeks flew by. My high school came my third week there, and it was such an amazing experience to be able to connect with people from my corner of the world in a place as magical as the Farm. God also brought people from my high school week in 2014 back to the Farm that week, as well: Vani and Amy from the Squaaaaad, my high school teacher and teachers from some of the other schools, my fellow Sojo Alex and several of the staff members, who were either staff or Sojos that year. I still can’t believe we were all there together again. My last week was another great one, the schools that came were amazing and I think I had some of my best conversations with people that week. By the end of my four weeks, I was in tears. Once again, I couldn’t imagine leaving this place, leaving my family, leaving the magic God put in those West Virginia mountains.

I pushed myself to do things I never thought possible while I was there. I helped Danny and Dan work on a porch, I helped Knell in the kitchen and probably the most difficult and wonderful experience, helping Torie work on Tammy and Michael’s roof. Those two weeks working on the roof were my two favorite weeks at the Farm. I was able to be a leader there on that roof, able to help Torie on her project and do what she delegated me to do. I can now say I have a basic understanding of how to put tin on a roof, which I think is pretty cool. I will never forget the kindness of the homeowners, of Tammy and Michael, how they opened their homes and their hearts to us at the Farm and all the volunteers that came through.

I made relationships that I know will last for years to come, because they are built on unconditional love and respect. I have friends in my fellow Sojos, even the ones I only knew for a week. I have friends in the staff members that were there. I grew in my relationship with others and my relationship with God, which still isn’t perfect and never will be, but when I’m in the mountains, it’s as close to perfect as it can get. I owe a lot of that to my prayer partner Tom, and the friendship and guidance he provided me while I was there. I’ll remember my late-night talks with my roomie Emily, and the friendship we built through our shared time there. I will remember all of these amazing people, because they hold a place in my heart that no one else ever will.

Nazareth Farm, this isn’t the last time you will see me. Until then, vaya con Dios!