Hello old friend,

I remember our last meeting as I was lying on my bed, staring at the white walls around me. You entered the room unannounced and made yourself acquainted with my surroundings. You lied down next to me in my bed and got under the covers, reminding me of my constant desires to feel the same from someone other than you. You whispered in my ear that you are here for me and never want to let me go. I tried to distract myself from your grasp as The Script played on Pandora, I tried to zone out your whispers with every strum of the guitar's chord.

You are never one that liked to be talked about. Every time I've tried, I've felt your grip against my arm, urging me to stop, to make people think that I am actually okay, when every time you kiss me, it's like a branding I'll never forget about. I'll never forget how with every visit, your hello kiss burns in my mind and makes my heart question what it should be feeling. Your jealousy shows itself around every corner after every romantic interest I've ever had. "No, you don't need those guys," you whisper to me, "I'm all that you need." I never understood why it was that you thought so highly of yourself... to think that you are all that I need is to say that my life is nothing. You treat me terribly, and yet, I still allow you to come back. Somehow, I still need you for me to realize that I am still human.

I don't like to mention how long that we have been together, or your jealousy, or how many times I've kissed another man to get my mind off of you. But for some reason, you come back, rushing like a tidal wave for no one's rescue. I must tell you that I don't want you here anymore, but I don't know how to get rid of you. I know one day soon, that we will part our separate ways. You and I are like a nuclear fallout, where only one of us seeks shelter but can't find it, and you leave your jealousy and anger in your wake. I don't know how you do it, but you always manage to create such a beautiful disaster.