I’m talking to the girl who made every day of school my personal Hell and to the boys who jammed scissors into my locker (a joke that played on the fact that I looked “emo”) and thought calling me “Pinocchio” was the best joke ever. I’m especially talking to the four girls who told me that I should kill myself as I was just a burden on those around me and also to those kids who decided to partake in causing my suffering so they could be in good graces with the “popular” or “preppy” crowd.
I want to say thank you. Out of all of the teachers in my childhood, you all might have taught me some of the most valuable lessons. You showed me how the words and actions of another person can shred the self-esteem and security of another. I learned that in the face of hard decisions, the majority of people are not brave enough to do what is right. You taught me that the only way for a person to never struggle is to conform, to give up my passions for the sake of other’s comfort.
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Next, I want to say I’m sorry because even though you all taught me these valuable lessons, I know I didn’t use them the way I was supposed to. I eventually dragged my way out of the suffocating pit you tossed me in and regained my voice. I fought your harassment with my own words and sharpened my best weapon, success, with every action. I decided that the only decision when it came to choosing whether or not to stand up to a bully was to take immediate action no matter the cost. And finally, I vowed that the only way I would ever actually fail in life was if I was never true to my character and morals. I will never give up who I am for the sake of your comfort.
You all were more than the people who told me to kill myself. You were the inspiration for me to keep living, because how could I die knowing that you would just choose another person to torment? I had survived so far and I had a family I could depend on and passions I still loved and enough stubbornness to keep living, so why not do just that?
So again, thank you for your harassment and torment but I’m sorry it didn’t go as planned.
