Depression: it impales our desire to do even the simplest routine tasks like getting out of bed at a reasonable hour, brushing our teeth, finding something to wear, and even taking a shower. Depression hinders our ability to see the positive side of tough situations, and sits on our shoulders like a thousand pound weight. It hurts, and it leaves bruises on our skin. This is something that most, if not all teenagers and young adults deal with regardless of how easy or how difficult our lives are in comparison. There are many different reasons and contributions to our pain, and naturally as human beings, we find different ways to cope. Then there's college. The college experience at any pace can be stressful, exciting, memorable, challenging, and then some. College puts our goals and dreams into perspective. We make tons of friends, go to events and parties; we procrastinate, lose sleep, and occasionally forget to turn in an assignment on time. These things are what make college, COLLEGE; and whether we choose to dive into the full spectrum of college life or only half way, that's how it is for most young students.

But here's the thing: College and depression do not work together.

As someone who's dealt with (and still deals with) the ins and outs of mental illness for most of my life, I know what it's like to feel incompetent and completely alone in an institution full of 15,000 other people. Anxiety spikes to an all time high and my insecurities are worn on my sleeve. Nothing I say in class seemed to be the correct answer, and my mind wanders off to other unimportant and puzzling thoughts in the middle of an important lecture. All I wanted to do was go home, sleep, and be left alone for eternity. I sometimes wanted to die. My motivation dwindled into a pit of empty and suddenly impossible goals. I doubted myself, and that was visible on my assignments and in the way I presented myself to other people. Friendships were lost and forgotten. Self pity and loathing were staples in my personality and behavior. This was not okay and definitely not how it was supposed to be. Even with all of these debilitating implications, I decided not to be ashamed of my woes. Instead, I've learned how to deal with my depression, challenge my inner demons, and start a long (and occasionally) bumpy road to my mental care. I encourage those of you with mental illnesses to do the same alongside seeking the help you need, and being able to focus wholeheartedly on the positive things in your life like college, maintaining healthy relationships, self-love journeys, and planning your future.

Although depression is still a heavy-hitting challenge for me, I've managed to find a few ways to improve my mental health along with seeking professional help and guidance. As I write this, I know that not everyone who suffers from mental illness can see the light at the end of the tunnel. Sometimes, it takes more than seeking professional help to turn things around. The hardest part about being depressed is not being sure if you'll ever just be okay again. What worked for me was taking a hard look in the mirror and looking past my failures and fall backs. It's not easy; but it's not impossible. In fact it took me more than once to take that hard look in the mirror and be able to cut down the weeds of despair and fertilize the person I wanted to grow into.

Mental health is absolutely just as important as physical health. It is vital that we take care of our minds as well as our bodies, and prevent ourselves from falling off into the land of eternal hopelessness.

Here are the things I had to do to overcome my strongest demons and engage in my college experience.

1. Accept the fact that you suffer from depression.

When you're in denial of your reality, you hinder your chance to get better. Assess your disorder, accept that it exists, and recognize that it does have control over you.

2. Make a list of short term and long term goals.

I've found it rather motivating to hand write (or type) my short term and long term goals and post it somewhere I can look at it on a daily basis and remind myself of exactly what I want to accomplish as the year goes by. Sometimes it helps to decorate and embellish the list as if it were an art piece. Even if is a small, effortless goals, write it on the list! The sense of accomplishment is an extraordinary feeling.

3. End toxic and damaging relationships.

This is something that will not happen overnight. Sometimes it takes a thorough plan, but it must be done. When you're suffering, you have absolutely no place in your life for people who are only there to bring you down, manipulate you, betray you, and then some. It. Is. Not. Worth. It. There are people at there for you who will take care of you and treat you the way you deserve to be treated, I promise.

4. Make time, and go to school events.

It's almost impossible not to make new friends or engage in random conversations with peers when you go to events. Whether it's a poetry slam, school dance, or a social event, you're usually guaranteed to have a good time. Even if your goal is not to make friends, just go and live a little. Experience!

5. Aim to dismantle the negative thoughts you have internalized about yourself.

This is a tough act to follow. I am currently still trying to disassemble the self-doubt and negative feelings that I had for myself when I was in my darkest hour. Every morning I looked in the bathroom mirror and reassured myself that I am worth it, and that I will do great things. Eventually, I started to believe it. It also took other methods like writing myself love letters, smiling more, and removing people from my social feeds whom I constantly compared myself to. Little things like that eventually started to heal my soul, and I try to incorporate self-love techniques into my daily routine.

6. Do not repress your emotions.

Sometimes repression can be considered "mental suicide." Holding back your inner anguish is damaging and does not help you especially when you have exams and papers to write. If you cannot let it out verbally, write it down. Keeping it inside eventually builds up. It's a massive headache. Do yourself a favor.

7. Improve your physical health and well-being.

This is not to necessarily lose weight, but to cleanse your body and allow you to feel refreshed. A factor of maintaining strong mental health is drinking plenty of water and watching what you put in your body. On a personal note, this is something that I am still working on myself and has made a difference if how I feel on a daily basis. You do not have to completely change your diet, but consider the difference you will feel when you eat something homemade as opposed to fast food on a significantly differing ratio.

8. Stop apologizing for who you are.

You've never owed anyone an apology for being who you are. You are you, and that's the number one person you should be worried about. Don't apologize for being too sensitive or too anxious. Don't apologize for having feelings. If people can't take the time to understand your battle, then they do not deserve your company. Embrace your flaws! You are only human.

9. Don't shame yourself for needing medication.

Antidepressant medication may not be everyone's cup of tea, but if you need them, that's OK. Remember that everyone deals with depression differently.

Well, everyone, if you've made it this far, thank you for reading! Remember that your mental health is just as significant as your physical well-being. College is already a great deal of stress; depression and mental illness do not help. Do what you can to take care of yourself, and have the best four or five years of your life. Don't give up.