How many times have you been terrified of losing someone who didn't actually give a shit about you? If your love life is anything close to mine, then the answer is a lot.
But honestly, so what? So you cared too much and got hurt. He lost someone who cared and that is a loss for him, not for you. Don't let the repeated "maybes" and "I don't knows" make you feel like you are incapable of being loved-- you're not.
Someone not loving you back in the way that you crave f***ing sucks, but it sucks the most when that person who doesn't love you back is you.
Your heart will thank you for waiting for someone who is sure about you--- someone who is willing to deeply invest himself in you. For now, when you feel unloved, try to give the love you've been giving out so easily to everyone else to yourself.
You know exactly what makes you feel loved. You're the love expert for yourself. No one can love you in the way that you love you.
If you're feeling unloved-- buy yourself flowers, make a playlist, go for a nature walk, volunteer for an organization that makes your heart all warm and fuzzy, sit at your favorite coffee shop, plan the best future you can think of, get dinner with your friends, hit up the gym, take time to read books that don't cost over $100 at your university's bookstore, go out every night during the weekends, schedule a massage, get your nails done, etc.
Do whatever it is that makes you feel like you are exactly where you want to be.
When you're feeling unloved after waking up to no good morning or 'have a great day babe!' texts-- Don't leave the power of starting your day off happy in someone else's hands. Turn good morning texts from a guy who treated you like a sometimes into notes of self-encouragement for the day or a cup of your favorite coffee. Listen to your favorite playlist and dance around your room. Make a schedule for the day so you can get shit done.
When you're feeling unloved because you don't have your go-to person to talk to about your day-- Call your mom, tell your roommates, send 10 snaps to your best friend with ugly facial expressions which reflect what you're talking about, etc. Having someone who says "Nice," or "That's good" when you tell him about something that made you happy that day-- yeah, there's not really as much to miss there as you think there is.
When you're feeling unloved because you lack physical affection-- Honestly not sure what to tell you here. Being in a cuddly mood with no one to cuddle with is rough. Possible solutions include: finding a cuddle buddy, buying a body pillow, burritoing yourself in a bunch of blankets. Try to not let yourself get caught up on not having a body next to you-- one morning you will wake up next to someone who can't get enough of you and you'll make pancakes when you get up and it'll all be okay.
When you're feeling unloved due to lack of confidence in your appearance-- Find what makes you be able to look at yourself in the mirror and be like "damn I'm beautiful." Maybe it's you with full makeup, your hair looking nice, and wearing a cute outfit or you with sweats, no makeup, glasses, and hair up in a bun. Maybe it's you with your heart a little heavy from being there for anyone who needs it or you with the biggest smile because you saw a cute boy on the way home! Maybe it's you just seeing in your eyes that you really are going to be okay.
Find what you love and let it love you back.
Once you start seeing the beautiful parts of yourself that you love, you start to realize that you deserve to be with someone who sees you how you see you.
When we lack confidence in ourselves, we allow ourselves to be with people who are only interested when it's convenient for them or people who are never consistent or people who don't know what they want. If you're feeling like you need someone to make you feel loved, I hope you have the strength to find that person in yourself.
