To The Long-Term Friend:
You were there through everything and for that I am eternally thankful. You rose to the occasion each time things in my life seemed to go sideways. You held my hand through each phase of my life. Your friendship is one that isn't easily let go, nor easily found.
To The Friend I Let Go:
I let go for a reason. I don't mean to sound harsh or hurt you in any way but chances are I could no longer be your friend. I've never been one to shy away from the darkness within people but sometimes your actions make me turn the other cheek. I can't condone your actions and I can't stand by while you make decisions that I know are awful. I have to distance myself because right now you are too much of a risk. Chances are if I let you go I made that decision. I try my best to see the light in everyone, and yours could not be found. Frankly, I don't care about the old dilapidated, forever gone friendship. I don't want it back and I don't miss it. I know that sounds awful but truly, I don't want to be your friend. You know that, though, so at least we are on the same page.
To The Drifter:
You drift. It's what you do and I have known that for over 10 years. I know you will read this and I know you will take offense to it. That's not my intention. You came into my life and became my best friend. We survived all of the awkward phases of middle school. Yet, every so often you detour and we just stop talking. I won't say I hold none of the blame because that's not the case. You were my absolute best friend and letting you go off while you needed to was one of the hardest things I have done. I never knew when you would come back, but I knew you would. I would stalk your photos and make new friends myself but it was never the same as the nights I spent driving around town with you. I never found a match that fit so perfectly as you did. The thing is, I have no hard feelings towards our friendship, past or present. I feel nothing at all right now because deep down I hope you will return. I hope one day we will regain what seems to be forever lost. It hurts more this time. This time, I have exciting things to tell you yet I can't because this weird silence has come between us. So, instead of texting you about my home, about my new bedspread and my struggle to find curtains, instead of telling you about my wedding plans, I'll watch your Facebook and hope things are going good for you. I truly wish you the best.
To The FEW That I Regret Losing:
I am the no regrets guru. I have no regrets in my life except for losing 2 friends. Only 2. You 2 were there in the roughest time of my life and honestly, I took that for granted. You both told me straight to my face when I was doing wrong and for that I am forever grateful. You both are still friends and a part of my heart stings each time to know that I lost that friendship. I take full blame. I was the worst friend, I was self-absorbed, and I sucked all around. I am sorry. I know sorry won't erase my mistakes in the past and I know we most likely won't go back to how it was. That's okay. I am still in your corner. I am rooting for you from afar. If anything, please know that the moments I was a good friend... that was the true me. I promise. The times I held you in the floor as you hyperventilated. The times I would stay at your house until it was way dark and the times that I generally sat in your living room and talked with your parents. That is the 'me' I wish I would have been the whole time. That wasn't faked. The bad parts were not who I wanted to be and not the person I am now. Actually, you two don't really know me now because I have immensely changed over the last two years. I do wish the best for you in the future.
To The New Friends:
Sometimes I will suck at "friending". I am sorry. Sometimes I will forget to text back. Honestly, you can double text me all day long if I do forget. I will answer. Sometimes I have airhead tendencies. I am not the same person I was years ago, or even one year ago. I am a totally different person. I grew up. I have a lot on my plate every day so please don't take it personally when I can't go out every weekend.
Thank you for understanding that I am not perfect and I'm not a perfect friend but I will try my best. I will be here to listen or to help you in any way I can. Thank you for understanding that although we may not be in the same positions in life that I will be empathetic to your dilemmas and assist in any way I know how. I will be the best friend I know how to be and honestly I have gotten pretty good at being a friend. Thanks for coming into my life and making it a little more colorful. Thanks for being there when I want to fuss about the rude people I deal with at work, the test I bombed, or the fact that all of my clothes are absolute trash. Thank you for accepting the honest, true me long before you knew what you were getting into.