In our society, it's safe to say that it's almost definitely expected of the male to initiate any romantic action. I mean, it isn't as if this is any different than basically any point in history. That seems to have always been the man's role, and few, if any, have a real issue with it. However, ladies, you need to understand something. I know for a fact that as a female, it is always a compliment to be asked on a date. For a guy to muster up the courage to ask you out should speak volumes about what he thinks of you. Therefore, I think you owe it to him to, at the very least, let him have a chance.
To begin, let me discuss a less likely scenario. Sometimes, a guy will ask out a girl who is dating another guy. I would never expect a girl to say yes to a date while in another relationship. However, all I would want as a guy would be for the girl to clearly communicate that she is unavailable. Making up a story or an excuse just opens the door to misunderstanding. If you are clear and honest, I couldn't lose respect for you, nor could I justify feeling upset with you or blaming you in any way. I would simply appreciate that you showed me enough respect in order to talk to me about it.
Speaking from my own experience, when I decide to ask a girl on a date, it is primarily out of respect for that girl. In other words, I would only want to take a girl on a date who I respect in some capacity. Sometimes, it may be because I have seen that the girl in question is very kind, or maybe she makes me laugh. Realistically, it's probably a combination of some desirable characteristics. But, on the other hand, maybe I know very little about her. Maybe I think she's pretty or think she seems like someone I'd be friends with. I think that just as rightfully merits asking her on a date. Therefore, whatever the case may be, being asked on a date should communicate that I think highly of you in some regard. There's no bad way to take being asked on a date, in my opinion. Then, if you consider that, I think girls should be flattered when asked on a date, even if I'm not her first choice.
So girls, my advice to you is, consider going out on that first date. You never know what guy could surprise you. Your impression of him could change entirely if you allow him to give you his time. He has an opportunity to blow you away on that one date, or at least make a decent first impression. The thing is, communication is key. If you don't enjoy the date, or feel like he's not the kind of guy you'd like to keep dating, just talk to him about it. Trust me, I know it isn't easy. However, he went out of his way to ask you out, which can be extremely intimidating. So I believe he deserves the honesty. The worst thing you can do to a guy, and I absolutely speak from experience, is let him wonder every moment what you are thinking. I've had weeks where I've been emotionally drained, constantly trying to decipher whether a girl really likes me or has no interest at all, which is surprisingly unclear at times. Please ladies, for the sake of us guys, don't just say you're busy if a guy keeps asking you out. Let him know you're not interested in a romantic relationship, and he'll have to respect that. Otherwise, that's his problem.
One last piece of advice for you is this: don't allow one guy to blind you to all the others. If you're interested in a guy and he isn't giving you the time of day, consider that he may not be the guy for you. Sure, the day may come when he realizes how awesome you are. And I hope that day comes. However, if in the meantime another guy asks you on a date, at least give him a shot. Going on a date shouldn't mean that you're unavailable. Plus, you never know how amazing a guy might end up being if you never give him a chance.
Ladies, I encourage you to at least consider what I've said. I really believe that if you're open to going on more dates, you'll have some really fun experiences. And who knows, the next guy to ask you out could take you on the best date of your life.
If you didn't see my last article, this is basically a follow up to that one, which discussed casual dating. This article may have more impact if you read that one as well. You can check it out here.
