In college, you change as a person -it’s inevitable. Even more than high school, you learn more about yourself than you ever thought possible or thought you wanted to. I’ve finally arrived at my last semester and the end is in sight, and I’m sure before it’s over I’ll have learned a great deal more. So if I had any advice (especially for a student here) to give, I’d tell them these things:
High School Life Has No Bearing In College
It matters to people slim-and-none here. In my experience, even where you’re from only makes a difference if you’re carpooling back to your hometown(s). Sure, people will ask – they might ask if you vaguely know so-and-so, but by and large it’s just for introductions and small talk. It doesn’t matter what clique you were in (or if you were in one at all). In fact, wearing your HS sport’s letter jacket makes you stand out as a Freshman as much as wearing your ID lanyard around your neck. Outside of class, you’re never stuck with the same crowd unless you choose to be.
You Don’t Have to Have It All Figured Out Right Now
Seriously, be Undecided for a year or so if you need to – get those generals out of the way! I pushed myself into a major that eventually left me feeling unfulfilled at the end of the day. Also, if you do decide to change your major, it’s not the end of the world.
Choose Your Living Situation Wisely
This is a bigger part of college life than most people will initially tell you upfront. Beware (or at least be cautious of) random roommates. Live in an environment you know you’ll be comfortable in, even if it’s not the conventional dorm. You’ll thank yourself later when your rugs/clothes/cups are urine-free, your furniture is intact, and/or you’re not being kept up during the week until after 2 AM. Thus far, I’ve discovered the best roommate for me is...myself!
College Friends are Great!BUT…
Just know that some people really do fit the cliché of being temporary for one reason or another. Sometimes your chosen fields will drag you in different directions (which applies even if you have the same major). Other responsibilities will get in the way. You will make friends with a variety of people. I have friends that I have to pester to hang out with me, even on weekends. I have friends that I’ve driven through snowstorms to bring them to get chocolate. And I have friends that have helped get my car unstuck from piles of snow and watch my favorite shows with. All of the above is okay and just another part of life they don’t tell you enough. Focus on yourself and not the fair-weather friends – you’ll have a lot more energy that way.
Join Something and Branch Out
Sometimes going to class isn’t enough. If your comfort zone is your room that you refuse to leave unless you have to, you’re missing out. Early in my college career I resigned myself to little more than schoolwork and my video games/TV/laptop, and found out later I missed some great opportunities. Clubs and student organizations are just one example of breaking the static cycle.
Travel and See Beyond Campus Life
If nothing else, being in the isolated Grand Forks area has taught me the satisfaction of leaving it. Though pessimistic that may sound (and it is true), my desire to leave has broadened my horizons and has brought me to destinations I likely wouldn’t have gone otherwise. Since I started at UND, I’ve taken road trips to Omaha and Chicago for leadership conferences and have taken winter/spring break trips to visit friends in the Cincinnati and Atlanta areas. The sleepiness of ND has also spurred me to take my own solo SB trip to Chicago to explore. Last but not least, I’ll be spending my spring break abroad on a school venture to London. I didn’t expect to be traveling like this until long after working in the real world. As a result, I’d say travel, see the world, study abroad, stay with someone you’ve only met online and via Skype in a strange, giant city for a week (okay, maybe not that one) – it’ll be more difficult when you’re trying to balance your allotted days off in the working realm.
Lastly…
If you feel the need to reinvent yourself, go ahead! Aside from class, etc. schedules, few things are fixed. Listen to new genres of music, go to a couple parties, make new kinds of friends. I personally started out college believing a lot about myself that ended up not being true; I came to college seeking an escape from my hometown. I voted Republican because my family did, and didn’t question it because it was what I was “supposed to do”. I convinced myself I was straight and denied anything else. I planned to move to Georgia upon graduation as soon as I could with my air traffic controller experience.
I still have quite an open disdain for my hometown and I won’t entirely rule out the possibility of moving to the Atlanta area someday, but I can happily say I’ve changed for the better. So while you may not go through such an extreme transformation as I have, from shy Republican-voting, air traffic controller to an English major who tends toward the Democrat side spending his days seeing the world AND still playing his video games, I can say that who you are at the start of college will change as you near graduation.
